James Russell: I want some answers! Franklin Hatchett: Hey man, me and Guy just down here, checkin' out some fly rides, and mackin' some hos and chillin'. James Russell: Imagine that. It's like a G-Dog on a fly tip. Flossin' wit da posse. Cuttin' in da crib. WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN? Franklin Hatchett: Man, I don't wanna have to beat yo ass, but I will *beat* *yo* *ass*!
Petey: [singing around a campfire with his banjo] 'Bout a handsome little fox let me sing you folks a yarn. / Hey, diddle-dee daddle-da doddle-do doodle-dum! / 'Twas a splendid little feller full of wit 'n' grace 'n' charm. / Say, zippy-zee zappa-za yappy-yo doodle-dum! / Well, like any little critter needin' vittels for his littl'uns, / Well, he stole, and he cheated, and he lied just to survive. / With a doodle-dum diddle-die doddle-diddle doodle-dum! Other singers: Doodle-dum diddle-die doddle-diddle doodle-dum! Petey: Zippy-zo zippy-zay zippy-zappy zoopy-zee! Other singers: Zippy-zo zippy-zay zippy-zappy zoopy-zee! Petey: Doo-dah doo-day day... Petey: Let me take a little tick now to color in the scene: / 'Cross the valley lived three yokels name of Boggis, Bunce, and Bean. / Now these three crazy jackies had our hero on the run. / Shot the tail off the cuss with a fox-shootin' gun. / But that stylish little fox was as clever as a whip / Dug as quick as a gopher that was hyper-ack-a-tive. Other singers: Yeah! Petey: Now those three farmers sit 'twhere there's a hole 'twas once a hill. / Singin' diddle-dee daddle-da doddle-do doodle-dum! / And as far as I can reckon they're a-settin' up there still. Singin' zippy-zee zappa-za yappy-yo... Franklin Bean: [standing behind him] What are you singing, Petey? Petey: Just... just making it up as I went- as I went along, really. Franklin Bean: That's just weak songwriting. You wrote a bad song, Petey!
Ace Ventura: [with a German accent] How can I be getting zis vork done wit all de shouting? Control de shouting? Reporter: Who's That? Ace Ventura: Heinz Getwellvet. I am trainer of dolphins. You want to talk to de dolphin, you talk to me. Reporter: What happened to the other trainer? Ace Ventura: Vat happened to him? Vat happened to me? Seven years I am wit Siegfried. [he holds up only four fingers] Ace Ventura: Ve are making de dolphins disappear, und den Roy is coming wit de vite tiger und ze shtuffing in de pants und den I'm gone. Reporter: [skeptically] Where is Snowflake? Ace Ventura: Why do you care about Snowflake? Do you know him? Does he call you at home? [shouts] Ace Ventura: Do you have a dorsal fin? To train ze dolphin you must zink like ze dolphin! You must be getting inside ze dolphin's head. I am saying to Snowflake, "Akay!... Akay Akay Akay?" und he is saying "AKay Akay!" und he is up on ze tail "Eeeeeeeeee!" und you can quote him! [Ace spits] Roger Podacter: Alright, it's almost time for Coach Shula's press confrence, uh, lets let Heinz do his work? Ace Ventura: [shooing reporters] Go to de conference, go to it.
[at a supermarket] George: I'll tell you what I'm doing. I want to buy eight hot dogs and eight hot dog buns to go with them. But no one sells eight hot dog buns. They only sell twelve hot dog buns. So I end up paying for four buns I don't need. So I am removing the superfluous buns. Yeah. And you want to know why? Because some big-shot over at the wiener company got together with some big-shot over at the bun company and decided to rip off the American public. Because they think the American public is a bunch of trusting nit-wits who will pay for everything they don't need rather than make a stink. Well they're not ripping of this nitwit anymore because I'm not paying for one more thing I don't need. George Banks is saying NO! Stock Boy: Who's George Banks? George: ME!
Dice: I like hanging out wit you, Billie.
Marianne: Did you see him? He expressed himself well, did he not? Mrs. Dashwood: With great decorum and honour. Marianne: And spirit and wit and feeling! Elinor: And economy, 10 words at most.
Trelawny doorman: The squire's in Long Neddry for the grouse season. He will return on the feast of St. Lulu. [Jim, Rizzo and Gonzo, disappointed, start to leave] Trelawny doorman: Of course, his rich, off-wit son Young Squire Trelawny's here. [laughs]
Edie Sedgwick: I can't take it anymore. I want to die Wanda: And why do you want to die? Edie Sedgwick: Because my credit's no good at Bonwit Teller and I just stole $30 worth of underwear at Bergdorfs and I think I might do it again [laughs]
[about Pocahontas] Captain John Smith: All the children of the king were beautiful, but she, the youngest, was so exceedingly so that the sun himself - though he saw her often - was surprised whenever she came out into his presence. Her father had a dozen wives, a hundred children, but she was his favorite. She exceeded the rest not only in feature and proportion but in wit and spirit too. All loved her.
Christine: Now there's an intelligently biting remark wrought with wit and irony.
Demetrius: Chiron, thy years wants wit, thy wit wants edge and manners, to intrude where I am graced, and may for aught thou knowest, affected be. Chiron: Demetrius, thou dost overween it all and so in this, to bare me down with braves. 'Tis not the difference of a year or two makes me less gracious or thee more fortunate. I am as able and as fit as thou to serve and deserve my mistress' grace, and that my sword upon thee shall approve. And plead my passions for Lavinia's love. Aaron: [to the camera] Clubs, clubs! These lovers will not keep the peace. Demetrius: [to Chiron] Why, boy, although our mother, unadvised gave you a dancing rapier by your side are you so desprite grown to threat your friends? Go to! Have your lath glued within your sheath till you know better how to handle it. Chiron: Meanwhile, sir, with the little skill I have full well shalt thou perceive how much i dare. Demetrius: Ay, boy, grow ye so brave? [they draw] Aaron: [Aaron stops them] How now, lords! Here in the emperor's palace dare you draw and maintain such a quarrel openly? Full well I wot the ground of all this grudge. I would not for a million of gold the cause were known to them it most concerns. Nor would your noble mother for much more be so dishonored in the cort of Rome. For shame, put up. Demetrius: Not till I have sheathed my rapier in his bosom and withal thrust those reproachful speeches down his throat that he hath breathed in my dishonor here. Chiron: For that I am prepared and full resolved. Foul-spoken coward, that thunderest with thy tongue and with thy weapon nothing darest perform. Aaron: Away, I say! Now, by the gods that warlike Goths adore, this petty brabble will undo us all. Why, lords, think you not how dangerous it is to step upon a prince's right? What, is Lavinia then become so loose or Bassianus so degenerate that for her love such quarrels may be broached without controlment, justice, or revenge? Young lords, beware. And should the empress know this discord's ground, the music would not please.
Princess: Where were you? Johnny: Chillin' wit Kat. You know, that chick who drives the horse.
Molly Gunn: I'm so sorry, Mrs Schleine. Roma Schleine: Thank you for coming, Miss Gunn. Molly Gunn: Are you kidding? Nothing could keep me away at a time like this. Roma Schleine: [she places a check in front of Molly] Last week's pay and a month's severance. Molly Gunn: Severance? Roma Schleine: We're letting you go. Molly Gunn: We? Roma Schleine: That's right. Me and Ray. We. Goodnight, Miss Gunn. Molly Gunn: I'm sorry, but I'm not leaving without an explanation. Roma Schleine: I don't know what's been going on between you and my daughter, but she has made it clear that she never wants to see you again. Molly Gunn: She must be going out of her mind with grief. Roma Schleine: Actually, she's taking it rather well. I was at my staff meeting when I got the news about my husband. I came home to find Ray doing her homework. She's been very calm and level-headed about this whole affair. Molly Gunn: You call that taking it well? Do you know what etage your daughter's at in ballet? Or that she was banned from her science class for stealing a formaldehyde pig so she could give it a proper burial? The tea set you got her... it's exquisite and beautiful, but do you know how she likes to have her tea, how many lumps... one,two... cream,sugar? Roma Schleine: And the point of your little tirade is... Molly Gunn: You're right. You don't know what goes on between me and Ray because you don't know very much about your own daughter. Roma Schleine: I know my daughter well enough to respect her wishes. Molly Gunn: You don't give her respect. You give her whatever she asks for so you don't have to deal wit her. She's eight years old. She is not twenty-eight. Please remember that the next time you show her some respect. [storms out]
Jay: I fell in love wit chew. We fell in love wit chew.
[to dragon] Donkey: Why of course you're a girl dragon. You're just reeking of feminine beauty... hey, what's the matter wit you, you got somethin' in your eye?
Young Alexander: [trying to break in a horse Phillip has said could not be ridden] You don't like your shadow, do you? It's like a dark spirit coming up to get you. But you see? That's us. It's just a trick of Apollo, the god of sun. Shh. I'll show you how to outwit him. You and me, together. Shh. Bucephalus, that'll what I'll call you. Strong and stubborn. Bucephalus and Alexander. Come, now, let's ride together.
Gang Kid: [George sleeps after using 2 sleeping pills, and on there way to the hospital, his head is leaning on the window of the car] Hey wat up wit dat face, huh? Dat suppose to be me? [the others in car chuckle] Gang Kid: Ya gotta problem? Lozer? Franck Eggelhoffer: [Franck roles down the window a little] No we do not have a problem, so leaf us alone! Gang Kid: 'Leaf'? What are you a tree? Franck Eggelhoffer: Ha, ha, ha, very funny, you are obviously a comodian [pronounced Coe - Maw - Dee - Un] Gang Kid: Hey what kinda accent is that man? What planet are ya from? Franck Eggelhoffer: Vat Planet? The planet of not wanting to be die, by a drive by SHOOTING!
Joe Lambert: Bonwit Teller. Who the hell would wanna blow up a department store? Connie Kowalski: Did ya ever seen a woman miss a shoe sale?
Roxie: [singing] With just one more brain what a half-wit he'd be...
Sean: Mr. Wash wanna see you. Dee Loc: What he wanna see me for? Sean: It's worse than you think! Dee Loc: Huh? Man stall me out wit all that mystery shit and tell me what's up.
John Smith: It's not your fault Giorgio's a halfwit Strozzi. You wanna die for a halfwit?
Vince: You think you's the best racecar around. Well, if you want ta be the best, first you gotta beat the best. Lightning McQueen: I take it that would be you's guys? Vince: What, you don't believe us? You don't believe me, I will t'row down wit you right here, right now! Barry: Throw down! Down to the ground! On the road! [Vince slaps Barry]
Miles Darby: Look, I can play it alright. I just prefer playin' wit myself. Tyler Gage: Woa, what? Lucy Avila: He makes it too easy. Miles Darby: No, not playin' wit myself. Just listen.
Andy Devereaux: I didn't know there was a crime 'cause I didn't know you guys stole. I didn't know she was a wit 'cause I didn't know you guys committed a crime. And I don't want a share 'cause I don't steal. Pepe: Let me see if I get your version of the Commandments here, Charlie. So you're saying that stealing is bad, but what you do, which is lying and beating people and killing them and letting witnesses go 'cause you want to fuck 'em... that's good? You're like the idiot version of the Bible, you dumb fuck Moses!
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