Zsa Zsa Gabor  - Quotes

 A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he's finished.  

Tags: humor   sarcasm   wisdom     


Miss Congeniality  - Quotes

 Victor Melling:
In place of relationships, you have sarcasm and a gun!
Gracie Hart:
Oh, *I* have sarcasm? When every word that comes out of your mouth is dripping with disdain?
Victor Melling:
Ah! But that is because I am a miserable, grumpy elitist - and that works for me!
Gracie Hart:
You know what? I don't have relationships because I don't want them, an-an-and I don't have friends because I work 24/7. And you have no idea why I am the way that I am.
 

Oscar Wilde  - Quotes

 Why can't these American women stay in their own country? They are always telling us that it is the paradise for women.



It is. That is the reason why, like Eve, they are so excessively anxious to get out of it.
 

Tags: escape   humor   paradise   sarcasm   women     


Sherrilyn Kenyon  - Quotes

 Well, someone slap my butt and give me a hero cookie. (Nick) 

Tags: funny   hero   sarcasm     
Sorority Row  - Quotes

 Jessica:
Ugh, This is so stupid. We are missing out on the part of the year.
Cassidy:
I know, how inconvinent. Why couldn't Ellie have had a nervous breakdown tomorrow?
Jessica:
You know Cassidy, your sarcasm makes you sound like a bitch. And nobody likes a bitch.
 

Tags: Sarcasm Quotes   Art Quotes   Body Quotes   Us Quotes     
Brandon Sanderson  - Quotes

 You see, that is the sad, sorry, terrible thing about sarcasm.



It's really funny.
 

Tags: humor   sarcasm     
Oscar Wilde  - Quotes

 What are American dry-goods? asked the duchess, raising her large hands in wonder and accentuating the verb.



American novels, answered Lord Henry.
 

Tags: american   books   humor   novels   sarcasm     
J.K. Rowling  - Quotes

 Death's got an Invisibility Cloak?' Harry interrupted again.



So he can sneak up on people,' said Ron. 'Sometimes he gets bored of running at them, flapping his arms and shrieking...
 

Tags: humor   sarcasm     
Terry Pratchett  - Quotes

 Listen, Peaches, trickery is what humans are all about, 

Tags: government   humor   politics   sarcasm   trickery   voting     
Oscar Wilde  - Quotes

 Young people, nowadays, imagine that money is everything.



Yes, murmured Lord Henry, settling his button-hole in his coat; and when they grow older they know it.
 

Tags: humor   imagine   know   money   sarcasm   young     
Anger Management  - Quotes

 Dr. Buddy Rydell:
Now then we need to go over some ground rules. You are to refrain from any any acts of violence including verbal assault and vulgar hand gestures. You may not use rage enhancing substances, such as caffeine, nicotine, alcohol, crack cocaine, slippy-flippy's, jelly stingers, trick sticks, bing bangs or flying willards.
Dave Buznik:
How 'bout fiddle-faddels?
Dr. Buddy Rydell:
Under my supervision. Also, if you are unable to stop masterbating please, do so without the use of any pornographic images depicting quote, unquote 'angry sex.' That having been said, I'm a pretty good guy and I think you'll be pleasantly surprised how much fun we can have together.
Dave Buznik:
Geez, without slippy-flippy's or angry masterbating I don't see how that's possible.
Dr. Buddy Rydell:
Sarcasm is anger's ugly cousin... from now on, unacceptable.
 

Oscar Wilde  - Quotes

 Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit. 

Tags: oscar   sarcasm   wilde     
J.K. Rowling  - Quotes

 Do you remember me telling you we are practicing non-verbal spells, Potter? 

Tags: humor   rebellion   sarcasm     
Jack & Bobby  - Quotes

 Grace McCallister:
Is sarcasm your only mode now, Jack? I mean, I know your only a teenager but it might be time to mix things up a bit.
 

Robin McKinley  - Quotes

 If you wish, I shall go personally to your City and knock together the heads of Perlith and Galooney. 

Tags: aerin   luthe   sarcasm     
Stephenie Meyer  - Quotes

 Yes, heaven forbid I not be protected from tanks. 

Tags: bella   cars   sarcasm     
Christopher Moore  - Quotes

 Sarcasm will make your tits fall off. 

Tags: fool   sarcasm     
Lisa Shearin  - Quotes

 Vegard and Riston's job today was to guard and protect me. And considering that I was in a tower room in the Guardians' citadel, it looked like a pretty plum assignment. I mean, how much trouble could a girl get into under heavy guard in a tower room? Notice I didn't ask that question out loud. No need to rub Fate's nose in something when I'd been tempting her enough lately.



Phaelan had generously his guard services as well, just in case something happened to me that my Guardian bodyguards couldn't handle. Phaelan's guard-on-duty stance resembled his pirate-on-shore-leave stane of leaning back in a chair with his feet up, but instead of a tavern table, his boots were doing a fine job of holding down the windowsill. I don't know how I'd ever felt safe without him.
 

Tags: sarcasm     
Kristin Walker  - Quotes

 I'm telling you, you really should stick to mating within your species, whatever that is. 

Tags: gods   humor   sarcasm     
Seanan McGuire  - Quotes

 Hello? 

Tags: sarcasm   tybalt     
Nicki Elson  - Quotes

 Chapter Eight:



I know every guy here, and they
 

Tags: humor   romance   sarcasm     
Cassandra Clare  - Quotes

 I'm sorry. I use my rapier wit to hide my inner pain. 

Tags: humor   sarcasm     
Cassandra Clare  - Quotes

 Sarcasm is the last refuge of the imaginatively bankrupt. 

Tags: clary   jace   sarcasm     
Philip Pullman  - Quotes

 I am a story teller. If I wanted to send a message I would have written a sermon. 

Tags: sarcasm   writing     
Charles Dickens  - Quotes

 The doctor seemed especially troubled by the fact of the robbery having been unexpected, and attempted in the night-time; as if it were the established custom of gentlemen in the housebreaking way to transact business at noon, and to make an appointment, by the twopenny post, a day or two previous. 

Tags: funny   sarcasm     
Luke Romyn  - Quotes

 Fine, it 

Tags: assassin   sarcasm     
Lisa Kleypas  - Quotes

 The earl shook his head, exhibiting a degree of frosty offense that could only be achieved by an aristocrat whose wishes had just been gainsaid.  

Tags: humor   sarcasm     
Becca Fitzpatrick  - Quotes

 Vee-  

Tags: biology   humour   sarcasm     
Cassandra Clare  - Quotes

 What did Isabelle want? 

Tags: faeries   funny   madonna   sarcasm     
Dave Gorman  - Quotes

 In 1803, President Jefferson oversaw the purchase of this land from the French for $15 million. It doesn't sound like much for an area three times the size of France itself but given that they'd stolen it from the Native Americans in the first place, I suppose they couldn't grumble. Once some debts had been wiped and estate agents had taken their commission, Napoleon's France ended up pocketing a little more than $8 million. Which is about how much it cost Pepsi Cola to secure the services of Britney Spears. Times have changed. 

Tags: america   humor   sarcasm     
Bret Easton Ellis  - Quotes

 Yes. Yes I am. I am a completely demented misogynist.

 

Tags: sarcasm     
Oliver Goldsmith  - Quotes

 Ask me no questions, and I'll tell you no lies. 

Tags: humor   lies   questions   sarcasm   witty     
Douglas Coupland  - Quotes

 Hi! I'm Ethan, I shop at Ikea. I bought a $300 dining suite and it took me three days to assemble! 

Tags: humor   ikea   sarcasm     
Nicki Elson  - Quotes

 Chapter Eighteen:



You
 

Tags: humor   romance   sarcasm     
Gasmaskman  - Quotes

 Don't worry about it; only worry about how people like her breed. 

Tags: dark   humor   sarcasm   witty     
Mercedes Lackey  - Quotes

 ...Though drowned was just as dead as any other way of dying. 

Tags: humor   sadistic   sarcasm     
Nicki Elson  - Quotes

 Chapter Nineteen:



I
 

Tags: humor   sarcasm     
Linda Howard  - Quotes

 I thought you were a drunk. 

Tags: humourous   sarcasm     
Ellen Gilchrist  - Quotes

 That's great, 

Tags: love   sarcasm     
Kristin Walker  - Quotes

 We were in such good moods, we even decided to hit Todd's house for candy. Sam rang the doorbell, and when it opened, this hideous, rubber monster face roared at us. Sam screamed. Todd started laughing and took off the mask. I yelled,  

Tags: halloween   humor   sarcasm     
Nicki Elson  - Quotes

 Chapter Twenty-Eight:



Was she on some sort of Candid Camera version of This is Your Sucky Love Life?
 

Tags: humor   love   romance   sarcasm     
Neil Gaiman  - Quotes

 We...we could be friends.'



We COULD be rare specimens of an exotic breed of dancing African elephants, but we're not. At least, I'M not.
 

Tags: cats   friends   sarcasm     


Quotes of the Day