Dottie Hinkle: Hello? Beverly Sutphin: Is this the Cocksucker residence? Dottie Hinkle: God damn you! Stop calling here! Beverly Sutphin: Is this Four Two One Five Pussy Way? Dottie Hinkle: You bitch! Beverly Sutphin: Now let me check the zip code. Two-one-two-fuck-you? Dottie Hinkle: The police are tracing this call this very minute. Beverly Sutphin: Well, Dottie Hinkle, then why aren't they here, huh, fuckface? Dottie Hinkle: FUCK YOU! [hangs up] Beverly Sutphin: Bwaahahahaha! [immediately calls her back] Dottie Hinkle: DIDN'T I JUST SAY FUCK YOU? Beverly Sutphin: [in a different voice] I beg your pardon? Dottie Hinkle: Who is this? Beverly Sutphin: Mrs. Wilson from the telephone company. I understand you're having problems with an obscene phone caller? Dottie Hinkle: Yes, I am. I'm sorry, Mrs. Wilson. But this is driving me crazy! I've had my number changed twice already. I'm a divorced woman, please help me. Beverly Sutphin: Well what exactly does this sick individual say to you? Dottie Hinkle: I can't say the words out loud, I don't use bad language. Beverly Sutphin: Oh well, I know it's difficult but we need to know the exact words. Dottie Hinkle: I'll try. COCKSUCKER, that's what she calls me. Beverly Sutphin: [reverting to the original voice] LISTEN TO YOUR FILTHY MOUTH, YA FUCKIN WHORE! Dottie Hinkle: GODDAMN YOU! Beverly Sutphin: MOTHERFUCKER! Dottie Hinkle: COCKSUCKER!
Doctor: [racing towards the Ambulance with other doctors carrying the loaner body and Stu's body] Excuse me! That's our corpse. We've been chasing him all over town. Ambulance Driver: [sitting in the driver seat] Help yourself pal. Doctor: [pulling the cover off the loaner body] All right smart-ass you prepare to co-operate now? [Stu sits up, scaring the doctors]
Schoolteacher: Okay, next up is Ricky Bobby. Ricky, is your father here? 10-year-old Ricky: No, ma'am. I haven't seen my daddy in years. But, my mama say he's out racing cars, and, well, dipping his wick in anything that moves. [classmates laugh at what Ricky said] Schoolteacher: Okay, kids, that's enough. Were gonna move on to Brennan. 10-Year-Old Cal: Don't pay them no mind, Ricky. 10-year-old Ricky: Thanks, Cal. Shake and Bake. You'll be my best friend forever.
Luke Shapiro: So that was all bullshit right? All that stuff about embracing your pain, making it a part of you? You can't do this, you can't just give up. Life is hard and it's full of pain and what-not, but we take it cause there's great stuff too. And we can do it cause we have friends- because we have each other.
[the first day of Goofy's road trip] Goofy: [holding a video camera while driving] Day 1: Well, here we are, out on the open road, retracing the steps of my boyhood. And here's... [he aims the camera toward a brooding Max] Goofy: Maxie! Say, "Hi", Max! [Max pays no attention] Goofy: Well, how about a wave? Max: [putting his hand in front of the camera lens] Not now, Dad. Goofy: [laughing] What a kidder.
Mandy Slade: [voiceover on New Year's Eve '69] And on winding roads, in crowded clubs or hotel bar, this shipwreck of the streets rehearsed his future glory. A cigarette tracing a ladder to the stars.
Bison: [patching through to Guile on GNT World News] Colonel Guile! Greetings! Colonel William F. Guile: [to Cammy] He took the bait. Trace that signal, stat! Bison: Why do you address a fellow warrior with such disrespect? Colonel William F. Guile: Warrior? You? How many doctors and nurses have you killed this week? How many children have you orphaned? Bison: You will choke on those words, Guile. Colonel William F. Guile: Anytime, dickhead. We'll go worldwide, just like now. Dee Jay: General, they're tracing this. Bison: You think you're so clever, Guile. Think about this. You have three days. If my twenty billion dollars are not delivered by then, the hostages will die, and the world will hold you responsible! Victory! Dee Jay: [chanting with Bison's troops] Bison! Bison! Colonel William F. Guile: You hostages! If you can hear me, we're coming! We're coming! Charlie! Charlie, hang on, buddy! We're coming! We're coming! Hang on, buddy!
Cyborg: [Cyborg and Beast Boy are playing racing car games] You wanna past me, but you can't pass me, you can't pass... YOU PASSED ME!
Reporter: Thousands gathered to witness the maiden voyage of the Baron's technological marvel, Southland's newest wonder, the Treer MegaZeppelin. Reporter#2: ...at the hills above Los Angeles today, while on the ground, authorities are bracing the first riots since 1992. Reporter#3: You can see right there a car bomb went off just moments ago.
Shane: [Shane and Ford are driving a stock-racing car] Ford, traffic! Cary Ford: Aw! This is why I hate four wheels!
[after Sinclair has told them repeatedly to "go", to no avail] Merrill: So, when you say "go", you mean, just go? Donald Sinclair: Uh, begin, commence, start moving... theoretically you have been racing for about forty seconds now, and so far Mr. Schaffer is winning because he's nearest to the door.
CIA Director Ezra Kramer: So we have a dirty section chief who kills Bourne's girl, Bourne comes back for revenge, tapes Abbott's confession, and Abbott commits suicide. Now Bourne's gunnin' for us. You couldn't make this stuff up. Bourne's last confirmed location was Moscow, six weeks ago. Pamela Landy: Right. CIA Director Ezra Kramer: He's on the run, he's dangerous... Pamela Landy: [interrupting him] Now Sir, with respect, I think something else could be going on here. CIA Director Ezra Kramer: What? What's he after? Pamela Landy: The reason Bourne went to Moscow was to see the daughter of his first target. CIA Director Ezra Kramer: What's your point, Pam? Pamela Landy: Maybe he was retracing his steps. Just looking for something... something in his past. Maybe he hasn't found it yet. We need to know what it is. CIA Director Ezra Kramer: You're telling me he's not a threat to this agency? Pamela Landy: I think if he wanted to hurt us he could have sent the tape to CNN. CIA Director Ezra Kramer: Maybe he still will. My number one rule is hope for the best, plan for the worst. As far as I'm concerned, Bourne's still a serious threat, until proven otherwise.
Red Dawson: We're not honoring them, Jack, we're disgracing them.
Sam: If you can't laugh at yourself, life's gonna seem a whole lot longer than you like. Andrew Largeman: All right, so what are we laughing at you about? Sam: I lied again... I have epilepsy. Andrew Largeman: Which part are we laughing about? Sam: had a seizure at the law office where I work, and they told me their insurance wouldn't cover me unless I wore preventative covering. Andrew Largeman: What's preventative covering? Sam: The helmet I was wearing... Oh come on, that's funny. That's really funny, I mean I'm the only person who wears a helmet to work who isn't putting out fires or racing for NASCAR. But what do you do, I can't quit... their insurance is amazing, what do you do? You laugh. I'm not saying I don't cry but in between I laugh and I realize how silly it is to take anything too seriously. Plus, I look forward to a good cry. It feels pretty good.
[on why Ricky should resume his racing career] Susan: It's because it's what you love, Ricky. It is who you were born to be. And here you sit, thinking. Well, Ricky Bobby is not a thinker. Ricky Bobby is a driver. He is a doer. And that's what you need to do. You don't need to think. You need to drive. You need speed. You need to go out there, and you need to rev your engine. You need to fire it up. You need to grab a hold of that line between speed and chaos, and you need to wrestle it to the ground like a demon cobra! And then, when the fear rises up in your belly, you use it. And you know that fear is powerful, because it has been there for billions of years. And it is good. And you use it. And you ride it; you ride it like a skeleton horse through the gates of hell, and then you win, Ricky. You WIN! And you don't win for anybody else. You win for you, you know why? Because a man takes what he wants. He takes it all. And you're a man, aren't you? Aren't you? Ricky Bobby: [pauses] Susan, I've never heard you talk like that... Are we about to get it on? Because I'm as hard as a diamond in an ice storm right now.
[opening lines] Summer Pozzi: My name is Summer Pozzi. I'm a flight attendant. You've probably seen me on one of the flights. I'm the one in black heels and navy blue uniform bracing myself in the aisle at 30,000 feet while serving your coffee, collecting your trash, babysitting your children, cleaning up vomit, watching for terrorists, listening for engine problems, preparing the cabin for take-off, preparing the cabin for landing and everything in between.
Ricky Slade: I don't know why we don't get a drink, sittin' inside this place. Bobby: Chloe wanted to come here. Ricky Slade: She doesn't know where the hell she is, Bob. She'd have more fun if we were at Bordner's. She could play the trivia game that she likes or the little racing game thing she does . Bobby: She's a little girl, little girls don't like going to bars. Ricky Slade: We had fun. We went to bars when we were kids. Met all the different people. Right? Remember Slimmy? Salesperson: Excuse me sir, there's no smoking in here. Ricky Slade: Why, you serving food? Salesperson: No, it's store policy. And you can't sit at a station without purchasing a ceramic. Ricky Slade: You believe this shit. I can't sit at a station without purchasing a ceramic. Well, why don't you bring me a ashtray then. Can I color me that, a ceramic ashtray?
Anne Boleyn: [in the Tower] You'll look after Elizabeth. Mary Boleyn: [embracing Anne] It will never come to that.
Kevin Schwantz: I think 90% of motorcycle racing is between the ears.
Sandy Lyle: All right, we all need to look into our hearts and go, "Do I think this dude is gonna die in a few years or not?" Is old Leland here gonna fight off a man... who goes by the last name "Reaper," first name "Grim"? Or will this BASE-jumping, crocodile-wrestling, shark-diving, volcano-luging, bear-fighting, snake-wrangling, motocross-racing bastard die?
[at the races] Sean Ambrose: Darling, you won! Nyah Nordoff-Hall: I suppose I did. Sean Ambrose: What made you pick her? That old nag's never won a thing. Nyah Nordoff-Hall: [holds up racing form] "A Thief in the Night." Sean Ambrose: Ha! Say no more.
Harry Kingsley: Racing through the night, driven by his own iron will with a courageous - ...
Igby: [on Ollie] He was ten-speeding a gazillion miles per hour through Central Park. You know, racing with all the other young Turks. When, all of a sudden he caught a glimpse of himself in the handlebar mirror and became so... aroused by it that he burst his Speedo shorts which then got caught in the gears and threw him right on his face. Splatter.
Gerard's secretary: Sam, there's a guy on the phone claiming to be Richard Kimble. [cast cackling in background that "another" Kimble is on the phone] Deputy Marshal Samuel Gerard: This is Gerard. Dr. Richard Kimble: Do you remember what I told you in the tunnel? Deputy Marshal Samuel Gerard: [gesturing to his men to start tracing the call] Um yeah... It was noisy... I think you said something like you didn't kill your wife. Dr. Richard Kimble: Remember what you told me? Deputy Marshal Samuel Gerard: I remember you pointing my gun at me. [Gerard's team gestures him not to antagonize Kimble and make the conversation stretch] Dr. Richard Kimble: You said, "I don't care." Tracing Technician: [whispering] He's on the south side. Deputy Marshal Samuel Gerard: [to his team] Yeah... [then noticing Kimbles remake] Deputy Marshal Samuel Gerard: Yeah... that's right Richard... I don't care. I'm not trying to solve a puzzle here... Dr. Richard Kimble: Well, I am trying to solve a puzzle. Cosmo Renfro: Five seconds to location. Dr. Richard Kimble: And I just found a big piece! [slams down phone on desk so trace can continue]
Deirdre Boyle: Someone once said that sometimes it takes our best friends to tell us when we're screwing up, no matter how much we may not like it. Jenkins: [Skeptically] Who said that? Deirdre Boyle: [Bracing herself] Michael Moore on the French. Madore: I hate that guy. Pat: Everyone does.
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