Charlie Kaufman:
We open on Charlie Kaufman. Fat, old, bald, repulsive, sitting in a Hollywood restaurant, across from Valerie Thomas, a lovely, statuesque film executive. Kaufman, trying to get a writing assignment, wanting to impress her, sweats profusely. Fat, bald Kaufman paces furiously in his bedroom. He speaks into his hand held tape recorder, and he says: "Charlie Kaufman. Fat, bald, repulsive, old, sits at a Hollywood restaurant with Valerie Thomas".
Tom Jericho:
It weighs twenty-six pounds, battery included, and goes anywhere. The Enigma machine - the Germans have thousands of them.
Hammerbeck:
What's it do?
Tom Jericho:
It turns plain-text messages into gobbledygook. Then the gobbledygook is transmitted in Morse. At the other end is another Enigma machine, which translates the message back to the original text.
Hammerbeck:
And you have one of your own.
Logie:
Uh, courtesy of the Polish Cipher Bureau.
Hammerbeck:
So what's the problem?
Tom Jericho:
The problem? The problem is the machine has a hundred and fifty million, million, million ways of doing it, according to how you set these three rotors, and how you connect these plugs. Press the same key any number of times, it'll always come out different.
Hammerbeck:
And that's Shark?
Tom Jericho:
No. No, no, no, this is the one we can break. Shark is enciphered on a special Enigma machine with a fourth rotor, designed especially for U-Boats - which gives it about four thousand million, BILLION starting positions. And, uh, we've never seen one.
Hammerbeck:
Holy shit...
Anastasia:
[after Dimitri is kicked out of the Dowager Empress Marie's private balcony at the Russian ballet] It was all a lie, wasn't it?
Dimitri:
No, no...
Anastasia:
You used me? I was just part of your con to get her money?
Dimitri:
No, no, no, no - look, it may have started out that way, but everything's different now, because you really are Anastasia. You are!
Anastasia:
Stop it! From the very beginning, you lied! And I not only believed you, I actually... [grunts]
Dimitri:
Anya, listen, when you spoke about the hidden door in the wall, and about the little boy, listen to me, that was...
Anastasia:
NO! I don't want to hear about anything that I said or remembered, you just leave me alone! [slaps Dimitri, then storms away]
Dimitri:
[hollers after her] Anya, please, you have to know the truth!
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Tom Manning:
"Undercover." Can't he get the meaning of the word? I mean, we are still government-funded, we are still a secret, although a dirty secret, if you ask me. Officially, we-do-not-exist. So, you see, that's the problem when we get these. [shows Abe a series of photos]
Tom Manning:
Subway... highway... ah, park. [holds up one, showing Hellboy giving a "peace" sign with his stone hand]
Tom Manning:
And he posed for this one, and gave an autograph. I suppress each photo, cell phone videos, they cost me a fortune, and then they show up on Youtube... God, I hate Youtube!
Martin Q. Blank:
Do you *really* believe that there's some stored up conflict that exists between us? There *is* no us. *We* don't exist. So who do you wanna hit, man? It's not me. Now whaddya wanna do here, man?
Bob:
[Pulls out a folded up piece of paper]
Martin Q. Blank:
I don't know what that is.
Bob:
These are my words.
Martin Q. Blank:
It's a poem? See, that's the problem... express yourself, Bob! Go for it.
Bob:
"When I feel... quiet... when... I feel... blue..."
Martin Q. Blank:
You know, I think that is *terrific*, what you have right there. Really, I liked it, a lot. I wouldn't sell the dealership or anything but, I'm tellin' ya... it's intense!
Bob:
There's... more.
Martin Q. Blank:
Okay, would ya mind, just skip to the end.
Bob:
To... the very end? "For a while."
Martin Q. Blank:
Whew. That's good man.
Bob:
"For a while."
Martin Q. Blank:
That's excellent!
Bob:
You wanna do some blow?
Martin Q. Blank:
No I don't.
Bob:
[Hugs Martin]
