Ryan Bingham:
How much does your life weigh? Imagine for a second that you're carrying a backpack. I want you to pack it with all the stuff that you have in your life... you start with the little things. The shelves, the drawers, the knickknacks, then you start adding larger stuff. Clothes, tabletop appliances, lamps, your TV... the backpack should be getting pretty heavy now. You go bigger. Your couch, your car, your home... I want you to stuff it all into that backpack. Now I want you to fill it with people. Start with casual acquaintances, friends of friends, folks around the office... and then you move into the people you trust with your most intimate secrets. Your brothers, your sisters, your children, your parents and finally your husband, your wife, your boyfriend, your girlfriend. You get them into that backpack, feel the weight of that bag. Make no mistake your relationships are the heaviest components in your life. All those negotiations and arguments and secrets, the compromises. The slower we move the faster we die. Make no mistake, moving is living. Some animals were meant to carry each other to live symbiotically over a lifetime. Star crossed lovers, monogamous swans. We are not swans. We are sharks.
Queen Victoria:
I do want to help them, whatever you say. And not just the laboring poor, but the hungry and the homeless, and... There are people who are lost, and whose business is it to see to their welfare?
Lord Melbourne:
Well, in my experience, ma'am, it's best to let these things develop naturally. If you interfere, you risk overturning the cart.
Queen Victoria:
Well, Prince Albert doesn't agree. He's made a study of the working man's condition, he's full to the brim with ideas for their improvement.
Lord Melbourne:
Is he indeed? How inspiring.
Belize:
Real love isn't ambivalent. I'd swear that's a line from my favorite best-selling paperback novel, "In Love with the Night Mysterious", except I don't think you've ever read it. Well, you ought to, instead of spending the rest of your life, trying to get through "Democracy in America." It's about this white woman whose daddy owns a plantation in the Deep South, in the years before the Civil War. And her name is Margaret, and she's in love with her daddy's number-one slave, and his name is Thaddeus. And she's married, but her white slave-owner husband has AIDS: Antebellum Insufficiently-Developed Sex-organs. And so, there's a lot of hot stuff going down, when Margaret and Thaddeus can catch a spare torrid ten under the cotton-picking moon. And then of course the Yankees come, and they set the slaves free. And the slaves string up old daddy and so on, historical fiction. Somewhere in there I recall, Margaret and Thaddeus find the time to discuss the nature of love. Her face is reflecting the flames of the burning plantation, you know the way white people do, and his black face is dark in the night and she says to him, "Thaddeus, real love isn't ever ambivalent."
Steve Lopez:
'Points West' by Steve Lopez. A year ago, I met a man who was down on his luck and thought I might be able to help him. I don't know that I have. Yes, my friend Mr. Ayers now sleeps inside. He has a key. He has a bed. But his mental state, and his well-being, are as precarious now as they were the day we met. There are people who tell me I've helped him. Mental health experts who say that the simple act of being someone's friend can change his brain chemistry, improve his functioning in the world. I can't speak for Mr. Ayers in that regard. Maybe our friendship has helped him. But maybe not. I can, however, speak for myself. I can tell you that by witnessing Mr. Ayers's courage, his humility, his faith in the power of his art, I've learned the dignity of being loyal to something you believe in. Of holding onto it, above all else. Of believing, without question, that it will carry you home.
Prime Minister:
Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the arrivals gate at Heathrow Airport. General opinion's starting to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don't see that. It seems to me that love is everywhere. Often, it's not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it's always there - fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends. When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know, none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge - they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I've got a sneaking suspicion... love actually is all around.
Rev. Saviour:
I knew you were coming... so I sent everyone away... because I believed my final moment was at hand. Before you pull that trigger... and take my life, I would like the chance to tell you some things, perhaps to think about after I am gone. Don't worry about me stallin'. My people have orders to leave me to my studies for another 15 minutes. I will only take five. Can you bear with me? Will you? Then make up your mind. Today marks the change of not only a New Year, but a new millennium. Take a look around. The majority of the youth roam the streets... dealing in drugs, sex and violence, thinking these things have no real effect on life. Crimes without real punishment. An uncaring, unfeeling generation... without knowledge of self. This is the future of our nation, the future of our people. Do you think hatred and evil will go unpunished? The world is now feeling the heat... from flames it has kept burning since the beginning of civilization. You represent that fire. You and I are just a small part of God's plan. The evil men of this world have applied every method possible... to deceive its occupants. And each time with greater success than anticipated. But no more. Tonight, with this new millennium, God will begin to overcome this evil. I represent the truth... to the people. Without truth, nothing is sacred. The lie-that's what the devil is all about. You know that, that's why you're here. The truth is, we all play a grave role... in our own destruction. Your money. Your lifestyles. The things that people value and covet so dearly... are the bait that lures them out of the light. Through the love of others... I have power. The truth gives me this. Those that fear me send you here, here to murder all that I say. They use what you fear against you. Your fear of death, your fear of imprisonment. Where in this world is anyone safe from death? You see the lies you've been told? The path you take is not your own. Have you ever thought about how precious a life is? How difficult it is to create? How loosely and easily it has been for you to take away? Brother, help me. Help me to do what's right. Help me to stop the slaughter of our children. Help me to put an end to the disrespect... and the dishonor of our most valuable resource: the black woman. Help me put an end... to the destruction of the young mind through the use of drugs, alcohol. Help me to build up a population of great thinkers. People who create change... through thoughtfulness and spirituality. Will you choose that truth? Will you? Will you choose the light over the darkness? Hold it, stay where you are. Will you choose life? It's time. It's time, man. It's time.
[Marty has accepted Tannen's challenge to dual]
Seamus McFly:
You had him, Mr. Eastwood! You could have just walked away and nobody would of thought the less of you for it. All it would have been was words... hot air from a buffoon. Instead, you let him rile you, rile you into playing his game, his way, by his rules.
Marty McFly:
Seamus, relax, I know what I'm doing.
Maggie McFly:
He reminds me of poor Martin.
Seamus McFly:
Aye.
Marty McFly:
Who?
Seamus McFly:
Me brother.
Marty McFly:
Wait a minute, you have a brother named Martin McFly?
Seamus McFly:
*Had* a brother. Martin used to let men provoke him into fighting. He was concerned people would think him a coward if he refused. That's how he got a bowie knife shoved through his belly in a saloon in Virginia City. Never considered the future, poor Martin, God rest his soul.
Maggie McFly:
Sure'n hope you're considering the future, Mr. Eastwood.
Marty McFly:
[quietly] I think about it all the time.
Col. Arthur Freemantle:
You call yourselves Americans, but you're really just transplanted Englishmen. Look at your names: Lee, Hood, Longstreet, Jackson, Stuart...
Lieutenant General James Longstreet:
My people were Dutch...
Col. Arthur Freemantle:
And the same for your adversaries: Meade, Hooker, Hancock, and - shall I say - Lincoln! The same God, same language, same culture and history, same songs, stories, legends, myths - different dreams. Different dreams. So very sad.
Scott Calvin:
Did I miss anything?
Business Guy Across from Him:
No, we were, uh, just about to order lunch.
Scott Calvin:
Great! I'm starving.
Susan Perry:
I'll have a salad and iced tea, and dressing on the side.
Mr. Whittle:
Ah, paste and tomatoes, uh, and very light on the oil. Can you do that?
Scott Calvin:
And I'll have a Caesar. No dressing. And one of those homemade cookies, the warm chocolate chip. No nuts. And a little slice of cheesecake. Uh, crème brulee, and, um, hot fudge sundae, extra hot fudge. [licks his lips in addiction to tons of sweets, and looks at some people looking weirdly at him]
Scott Calvin:
[taking where he left off] On the side.
Waiter:
Anything to drink?
Scott Calvin:
[sighs] Ice-cold milk.
Susan Perry:
[wondering if he was really honest with them about his suddenly big belly] Stung by a bee, Scott?
Scott Calvin:
A big bee.
[first lines]
Michael "Goob" Yagoobian:
Then, um, I didn't choose that one because it was gonna give me pimples so I choosed, um, another scary one cause for, um, all those years that I went for halloween I wasn't scary at all... I love baseball. It's my destiny to play that game. And I don't really care about winning. Well, like, now i do, cause, like, we've lost every game and I've gotten tired of it! I'm working like so hard, all the balls are getting thrown to me, I'm trying to catch like everyone. All of the people in the out field are all looking around, and, c'mon, lets play some baseball, ok? not the lazy game... They're here... Lewis? Lewis?
Lewis:
Goob? Hey Goob? I've finished it! They're gonna love this!
Banky:
Stop the movie? What are you, crazy?
Jay:
All these assholes on the internet are calling us names because of this stupid fucking movie.
Banky:
That's what the internet is for. Slandering others anonymously. Stopping the flick isn't gonna stop that.
Jay:
This isn't fair. We came to Hollywood, I fell in love. Fuckin', we got shot at, we stole a monkey, and I got punched in the motherfucking nuts by a guy named Cock-Knocker.
Banky:
You know what? I feel for you boys, I really do, but Miramax - you know, Miramax Films - paid me a shitload of money for Bluntman and Chronic. So it occurs to me that people badmouthing you on some website, is NONE OF MY FUCKING CONCERN!
Silent Bob:
Oh, but I think it is... We had a deal with you, on the comics remember, for likeness rights, and as we're not only the artistic basis, but also obviously the character basis, for your intellectual property, Bluntman and Chronic. When said property was optioned by Miramax Films, you were legally obliged to secure our permission to transfer the concept to another medium. As you failed to do that, Banky, you are in breach of the original contract, ergo you find yourself in a very actionable position.
Jay:
Yeah.
Astrid:
Everybody asks why I started at the end and worked back to the beginning, the reason is simple, I couldn't understand the beginning until I had reached the end. There were too many pieces of the puzzle missing, too much you would never tell. I could sell these things. People want to buy them, but I'd set all this on fire first. She'd like that, that's what she would do. She'd make it just to burn it. I couldn't afford this one, but the beginning deserves something special. But how do I show that nothing, not a taste, not a smell, not even the color of the sky, has ever been as clear and sharp as it was when I belonged to her. I don't know how to express the being with someone so dangerous is the last time I felt safe...
Randal Graves:
So, your argument is that title dictates behavior?
Dante Hicks:
What?
Randal Graves:
The reason you won't let me use your car is because I have a title and a job description, and I'm supposed to follow it, right?
Dante Hicks:
Exactly.
Tabloid Reading Customer:
I saw one, one time, that said, "The next week, the world is ending." And in the next week's paper, they said, "We were miraculously saved at the zero hour by a koala-fish mutant bird." Crazy shit.
Randal Graves:
So, I'm no more responsible for my decisions here than, say, a Death Squad soldier in Bosnia?
Dante Hicks:
Oh, now, that's stretching it. You're not being asked to slay children or anything.
Randal Graves:
Yeah, not yet. [takes a drink of water]
Tabloid Reading Customer:
And I remember this one time- [Randal spits water at him]
Tabloid Reading Customer:
I'm going to break your fucking head! You fucking jerk-off!
Dante Hicks:
Sir! Sir, I'm sorry! He meant to hit me.
Tabloid Reading Customer:
Yeah, well, he missed!
Dante Hicks:
Yeah, I know. Here, let me refund your money, and we'll call it even, alright?
Tabloid Reading Customer:
I'll never come in here again. [to Randal]
Tabloid Reading Customer:
And if I see you again, I'm gonnna break your fucking head open! [Randal salutes him as he leaves]
Dante Hicks:
What the fuck'd you do that for?
Randal Graves:
Two reasons. One, I hate it when people can't shut up about the stupid tabloid headlines.
Dante Hicks:
Oh, Jesus!
Randal Graves:
And two, to prove a point. Title does not dictate behavior.
Dante Hicks:
What?
Randal Graves:
If title dictated my behavior, as a clerk serving the public, I wouldn't be allowed to spit water at that guy. But I did. So, my point is that people dictate their own behavior. Even though I work in a video store, I choose to go rent movies at Big Choice. Agreed?
Dante Hicks:
[gives Randal his car keys] You are a danger to both the dead and the living.
Randal Graves:
I like to think I'm a master of my own destiny.
Dante Hicks:
Please, get the hell outta here.
Randal Graves:
You know I'm your hero.
