Samantha:
All right. Jerry, I want you to acknowledge that my needs means nothing to you and you're a selfish prick and a liar.
Jerry:
Oh, my God!
Samantha:
Jerry, acknowledge.
Jerry:
I... Ok. I will acknowledge that I promised to go to Vegas with you. But now we're just slightly delayed. If you want to construe my wanting to stay alive as being selfish, well, then okay. But I have every intention of going with you because your needs are very important to me, sweetheart. Come on. Look at my all my stuff here, all over the pavement. Come on, baby? Huh? What do you say? Ok?
Samantha:
I'm going with or without you, Jerry. What's it gonna be? A bastard!
Jerry:
A bastard. What happened to, uh, "sweetheart" and "big love" and all those things you called me in the bedroom last night?
Samantha:
The only thing I'm interested in calling you, Jerry, is a cab!
Hannibal Lecter:
First principles, Clarice. Simplicity. Read Marcus Aurelius. Of each particular thing ask: what is it in itself? What is its nature? What does he do, this man you seek?
Clarice Starling:
He kills women...
Hannibal Lecter:
No. That is incidental. What is the first and principal thing he does? What needs does he serve by killing?
Clarice Starling:
Anger, um, social acceptance, and, huh, sexual frustrations, sir...
Hannibal Lecter:
No! He covets. That is his nature. And how do we begin to covet, Clarice? Do we seek out things to covet? Make an effort to answer now.
Clarice Starling:
No. We just...
Hannibal Lecter:
No. We begin by coveting what we see every day. Don't you feel eyes moving over your body, Clarice? And don't your eyes seek out the things you want?
Alex Cross:
Don't do it, Nick.
Dr. Kate McTiernan:
Alex.
Alex Cross:
Let's talk about it, ok? You want to put the lighter down, Nick? Please?
Detective Nick Ruskin:
She has to know.
Alex Cross:
She knows, Nick.
Detective Nick Ruskin:
Then why don't you shoot me?
Alex Cross:
Ah, I don't think so. Muzzle flare, room full of gas, all that, you know? Look, Nick I'm gonna put the gun down. Look, see? There now. How's that? I want you to think about this, Nick. If you do this, no one will ever understand.
Detective Nick Ruskin:
Oh, don't mind fuck me!
Alex Cross:
No, I'm not, Nick.
Detective Nick Ruskin:
See Kate? It's all about building rapport. You use the subject's first name, and your tone, you gotta keep it soft and steady.
Alex Cross:
Establish eye contact, seek his level.
Detective Nick Ruskin:
You wanna know the truth, Alex? You're the one who really needs help.
Alex Cross:
Well, enlighten me, Nick. Tell me what the truth is.
Detective Nick Ruskin:
Truth is looking at a beautiful woman, like our Kate here, and saying to yourself, I gotta have that. I gotta break her down. It's your basest animal self. Dig deep, Alex. You'll recognize him. He's ugly.
Alex Cross:
I've run into him now and then.
Detective Nick Ruskin:
Go ahead. Reach for the Glock and take me down before I tell you about the 10 days I spent with Naomi. 10 days, Doc. Things she'd never tell you. My brown sugar, face like an angel. Perfect, every inch of her. You never knew Naomi. Not like I did. Deep down, you envy me that. Say it.
Alex Cross:
I don't work like you. I don't, hate.
Detective Nick Ruskin:
You only wish you had the courage. Good night, sweet Kate. [Alex shoots and kills Nick through a carton of Milk before he can kill Kate]
Detective Nick Ruskin:
.
Alex Cross:
Kate. It's alright Kate.
Frank:
Kathy? K, is that you?
Kathy:
[on the phone with her brother Frank, She is very upset] Yeah.
Frank:
Mom said you sounded strange on the phone. What's going on?
Kathy:
I need help. I really need some help.
Frank:
What's wrong?
Kathy:
Do you think you could just come out here? Please?
Frank:
K, I'm sorry. I just got a real shit storm here. We just got the new models in, there's inventory... [to co-worker]
Frank:
I'll be right there. Just give me a second here.
Kathy:
I just feel lost, Frankie. You know? I just, um... I just feel lost.
Frank:
Look, Ma and the aunts will be out there on the 18th. They can help you, bring you back, straighten you out. Okay? I'm sorry, K, but I gotta go. Okay?
Kathy:
Okay... Yeah.
Frank:
All right. Chin up, baby sister. I'll call you later.
Kathy:
Okay. Hey, don't tell Mom, all right? [clicks, dial tone]
Kathy:
...Okay, bye. [Crying and whimpering in frustration over her inability to explain to her brother why she needs help]
Kathy:
FUCK!
Yorish:
I say that civilization is an illusion, a game of pretend. What is real is the fact that we are still animals, driven by primal instincts. As a psychiatrist, you must know this to be true.
Carol:
To be honest, ambassador, when someone starts talking to me about the truth, what I hear is what they're telling me about themselves more than what they're saying about the world.
Dr. Henryk Belicec:
Quite right, well done, doctor.
Yorish:
Perhaps this is true, perhaps being a Russian in this country is a kind of pathology. So what do you think, can you help me? Can you give me a pill? To make me see the world the way you Americans see the world. Can a pill help me understand Iraq, or Dafur, or even New Orleans?
Dr. Henryk Belicec:
Don't be drawn in by his madness, doctor. He is Russian, he needs to argue like he needs to breathe.
Yorish:
All I am saying is that civilization crumbles whenever we need it most. In the right situation, we are all capable of the most terrible crimes. To imagine a world where this was not so, where every crisis did not result in new atrocities, where every newspaper is not full of war and violence. Well, this is to imagine a world where human beings cease to be human.
Carol:
While I'll give you that we still retain some basic animal instincts, you have to admit we're not the same animal we were a few thousand years ago.
Yorish:
True.
Carol:
Read Piaget, Kohlberg or Maslow, Graves, Wilber, and you'll see that we're still evolving. Our consciousness is changing. Five hundred years ago, postmodern feminists didn't exist yet one sits right beside you today. And while that fact may not undo all of the terrible things that have been done in this world, at least it gives me reason to believe that one day, things may be different.
Yorish:
Thank you, doctor.
Carol:
You're welcome, ambassador.
Dr. Henryk Belicec:
Excellent.
Mooj:
[talking to a customer] This is a great TV. Nothing beats a plasma.
Jay:
What are you doing? That's my customer.
Mooj:
It certainly is not. When I came upon her, she was unattended
Jay:
No, no, that's my... She was unattended because I went to the back to get the brochure she requested.
Mooj:
I apologize, but it's too late. The transaction is completed.
Jay:
Then you gonna give me half the commission.
Mooj:
You will receive none of the commission.
Jay:
I need to talk to Paula. This is crazy, man!
Mooj:
This is bullshit! Every time I make a sale, you go crying to Paula. How about... how about Jesse Jackson? Oh, Jesse, he needs a call...
Jay:
I'm sick of you poaching my customers.
Mooj:
I'm sick of your crybaby bullshit!
Jay:
You wanna take this shit outside? You wanna just take it outside and just squash it?
Mooj:
Let's stay inside so everybody can see what a pussy you have, okay? Because when I remove the blade I keep in my boot from its sheath, I cannot return it until it has spilt blood.
Jay:
Listen to me, listen to me! You are fucking with the wrong nigger.
Mooj:
Hey, hey! You are fucking with the wrong sand nigger, okay?
Jay:
I will hang your old ass by your turban!
Mooj:
[Mooj has a very definite Indian accent] Oh, turban, now! Do you see any fucking turban here? Do I talk like a turban guy? Do I say, "Hey, Jay, you want a slurpee? You want a slurpee?" Fuck you, okay? I was born in Brooklyn. Brooklyn, okay? My accent is a fucking Brooklyn accent, okay? Okay?
Jay:
All right, man. Calm down, dude! Look... you still covering my shift on Friday or what?
Mooj:
If I can keep this commission... with pleasure.
Jay:
Cool, man. All right, pops. [They hug; Jay leaves]
Doris:
[looking at the room] My favorite color! Putty.
Harry Zimm:
What do you want, Doris?
Doris:
I miss Murray, Harry.
Harry Zimm:
Yeah, I miss him, too. Hell of a good writer, you know. I should know, I discovered him. Made him what he was.
Doris:
What he was, was a hack. He couldn't get a job writing for anybody but you. I'm being honest. He was a lousy writer, but he was a good husband. I just didn't know until it was too late.
Harry Zimm:
Yeah, well, twenty/twenty hindsight and all that. You know what they say.
Doris:
I hate being alone. The house is so quiet, so lonely. It needs a man's touch.
Harry Zimm:
Nice necklace, Doris.
Hunter:
Captain, here's the results from the missile drill.
Capt. Ramsey:
[looks at the missile drill results] Is this the best they can do?
Hunter:
No sir. But, that's what they did.
Capt. Ramsey:
I want this down in five minutes. Train on it.
Hunter:
Yes, sir.
Capt. Ramsey:
Tell your buddy Weps to do it again, and keep on doing it until he gets it right.
Hunter:
Yes, sir.
Capt. Ramsey:
It looks like the whole crew needs a kick in the ass.
Hunter:
Or a pat on the back, sir. I have witnessed a fight down in crew's mess, no big deal. It appears that the crew is a bit on edge about all we're going through. Morale seems a bit low.
Capt. Ramsey:
[picks up the intercom and speaks into it] May I have your attention please, crew of the Alabama, Mr. Hunter has brought it to my attention that Morale maybe a bit low. and you might be a bit... [looks to Hunter]
Hunter:
[whispers] On edge.
Capt. Ramsey:
[over the intercom] On edge. so, I suggest this. Any crew member who thinks that they can't handle the situation, can leave the ship right now. Gentlemen, we are at DEFCON 3, war is imminent. This the captain. That is all. [hangs up the intercom]
Hunter:
Very inspiring, sir.
Princess Nuala:
[with the others in the meat-locker] To wage his war, my brother needs this. [holding the crown piece and cylinder]
Princess Nuala:
The final piece of the crown of BethMora and this map to the location of the Golden Army chamber.
Johann Krauss:
The Golden Army. The harbingers of death, the unstoppable tide...
Hellboy:
[under his breath] Howdy Doody.
Johann Krauss:
Your Highness, if you hand the crown piece over to us...
Princess Nuala:
No. Where it goes, I go. My father died to uphold the truce with your world. We must honor his noble intentions.
Abe Sapien:
The lady is in dire danger.
Johann Krauss:
I take is your are vouching for her, Agent Sapien?
Abe Sapien:
Most emphatically, yes.
Johann Krauss:
Even so... I am sorry, but we simply cannot assume such responsibility on our own.
Hellboy:
[getting in Johann's face] Lady just lost her father, what more do you want?
Johann Krauss:
You may not care, but there are procedures, rules, and little handbooks that...
Hellboy:
She's coming with us. You got that, gasbag?
Johann Krauss:
[offended] What-what did you call me?
Prince Nuada:
[from behind the group] You! You will pay for what happened to my friend down there.
Hellboy:
[turning to face him, sarcastically] Yeah, right. You take checks?
Prince Nuada:
[enraged] Demon. Born from a womb of shadows, sent to destroy their world and you still believe you belong?
Hellboy:
Are we going to talk all night? Because I'm really sleepy.
[last lines]
Sarah McCaulley:
Morning, sleepyhead.
Rand:
I was dreaming of you.
Sarah McCaulley:
You were?
Rand:
[laughs] Yes, I was singing to you in my dream.
Sarah McCaulley:
Singing? What song?
Rand:
That Bob Dylan Song? 'Sara'?
Sarah McCaulley:
[laughs] I'd love to hear it!
Rand:
Oh, no.
Sarah McCaulley:
Koy-Koy needs to sing.
Rand:
I don't think so.
Sarah McCaulley:
Koy-Koy doesn't sing, he doesn't get any Kiki.
Rand:
[laughs] I'm not gonna sing.
Sarah McCaulley:
Sing!
Rand:
[singing] ... Sarah, Sarah, whatever made you change your mind?
Sarah McCaulley, Rand:
[Both singing] Sarah, Sarah, so easy to look at, so hard to define.
Peter "Weps" Ince:
Okay. What's going on?
Zimmer:
We're not going to let this go down with the X-O and Helm.
Peter "Weps" Ince:
We're not?
Zimmer:
No. We're not?
Lt. Bobby Dougherty:
We've been following the captain for years, and now this asshole Hunter shows up, and we're supposed to follow him because he said so?
Peter "Weps" Ince:
You're not supposed to, you were ordered to. That's what this is about, proper orders.
Lt. Bobby Dougherty:
Proper Orders? He has proper orders, he won't act on them
Peter "Weps" Ince:
He's in command now! If they order him to launch, we'll launch, and we'll blow 'em all to hell. But, I rather go down myself then get this one wrong.
Lt. Darik Westergard:
Weps. Our procedures are clear. In the absence of a contravening order and in a situation like this, we follow the orders in hand.
Zimmer:
That's right. You know how many checks that we have to go through to make sure that a message is authentic? The X-O agreed to those orders, now he just wants to throw them away they don't count?
Lt. Bobby Dougherty:
He's lost his nerve.
Peter "Weps" Ince:
Bullshit! I know this guy Bobby!
Lt. Darik Westergard:
Weps. We're prepared for launch. How can we just sit here and do nothing when they're prepared to launch at us?
Peter "Weps" Ince:
Well, we don't know that for sure that's the whole point. That is why he needs time to confirm the message.
Zimmer:
That's the whole fuckin' point is that we don't got time! Radchenko is fueling his birds and why do you think he's doing that? Huh? Why? Because you don't put on a condom until you're gonna fuck!
Gandalf:
For sixty years, the Ring lay quiet in Bilbo's keeping, prolonging his life, delaying old age. But no longer, Frodo. Evil is stirring in Mordor. The Ring has awoken. It's heard its Master's call.
Frodo:
But he was destroyed. Sauron was destroyed.
Gandalf:
No, Frodo. The spirit of Sauron endured. His life force is bound to the Ring and the Ring survived. Sauron has returned. His Orcs have multiplied. His fortress of Barad-Dur is rebuilt in the land of Mordor. Sauron needs only this Ring to cover all the lands with a second darkness. He is seeking it, seeking it, all his thought is bent on it. The Ring yearns to go home, to return to the hand of its Master. They are one, the Ring and the Dark Lord. Frodo, he must never find it.
Buddy Love:
[to Reggie] Ok, fat jokes! You wanna do fat jokes? [Buddy stands up]
Buddy Love:
Alright! [Buddy claps his hands once]
Buddy Love:
Your mother's so fat, the bitch needs Thomas Guide to find her asshole! [everyone in the room, except Reggie, roars with laughter]
Buddy Love:
Alright! Wait, wait, wait, your mother's so fat, after sex I roll over twice, and I'm still on the bitch! [everyone, except Reggie, laughs louder]
Buddy Love:
[to Reggie] Your mother is so fat, she fell in the Grand Canyon and got stuck! [everyone, except Reggie, laughs even louder]
Buddy Love:
Reggie's mother's so fat, that the bitch gets her toenails painted at Earl Scheib! [everyone in the room, except Reggie, loudly roars with laughter. Buddy climbs onto the stage]
Buddy Love:
[walking past Reggie] Earl Scheib! At Earl Scheib! [laughs]
