Nick Mercer: The hardest thing is loving someone and then having the courage to let them love you back. But if you know her shit and she knows yours, and at the end of the day if you still would rather give up than try, nothings ever going to be worth it. Maybe think about it this way... you go back, you get to spend the rest of your life having really great makeup sex.
Cheryl: Sit right down here, ma'am. We're going to make you pretty. Now how do you like your hair? Big Haired Woman: What? Are you going to do my hair? Cheryl: No, I just need to know if that's your usual way of wearing it, all big and high. If it is, I'll just put more makeup on your chin to offset it. You're going to want to take a whole bottle of this home with you. It's got quite a lot of ingredients in it, so you're getting a good deal. It's got ginkgo extract in it. Do you know what that is? Big Haired Woman: No. Cheryl: It's extract of the ginkgo, and it makes your skin real slick so that any liquid will roll right off you, be it water, or lemon juice, or urine. I'll put it in a bag for you.
Nina: It's an email from Jagjit. Oh listen to this: "Loyal friend seeks suitable alliance for big-mouthed but well-intentioned roommate. Nineteen years, 5'11". Currently pursuing a degree in engineering. US Citizen... Girl should be very open-minded and understanding" Priya: Oh that is so cute! Oh my god, you have to go! Nina: No way, it's gonna take more than a fungal ad to makeup for last night. [Nina gets another email and is reading it] Nina: "Okay, how about a nice home-cooked dinner?" [looks around and see Jagjit in front of her] Nina: Jagjit... Jagjit: Come by the apartment at 8 o'clock tonight. You will be amazed. AND NO INDIAN STANDARD TIME!
Gregory Larkin: But I love the old Rose! The one with no makeup and baggy clothes who loves 'the perfect bite'! She eats carrots now, isn't that tragic?
Mia: I'm not gonna be able to do this. Nicole: Well, I suggest you try. It isn't like you burnt the toast, Mia. You killed your husband. It's all off the chart demerit-wise. Understand? Mia: You are so calm. Look at you. Your hair is done. You've got makeup on. Nicole: This is a day like any other day. We did what we have to do and it's done. Ok? It was self-defense. You've been taking it fot too long and you finally said fuck off. Good for you. Fuck him. Fuck them. Mia: Everything but fuck you. Nicole: Roughly. Now, come on! [clapping her hands like a teacher to a pupil] Nicole: Places!
Nurse: [Vancome Lady is in a coma] It's hard to tell how much work she had done. I'm gonna need a chisel to get all that makeup off. Vancome Lady: [thinking] Watch it there, Moesha. I may be a coma but I'm not deaf.
Gwendy Doll: All my makeup is cruelty free!
Bela Lugosi: Karloff? Sidekick? FUCK YOU! Karloff did not deserve to smell my shit! That limey cocksucker can rot in Hell for all I care! Edward D. Wood, Jr.: What happened? Bela Lugosi: How dare that asshole bring up Karloff? You think it takes talent to do Frankenstein? It's all makeup and grunting. [Mocks Frankenstein] Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Bela, I agree with you 100%. Now, "Dracula," that's a role that requires talent. Bela Lugosi: Of course. Dracula requires presence. It's all in the eyes, and the voice, and the hands... Edward D. Wood, Jr.: [interrupting] That's right. That's right. You seem a little agitated. You wanna to go outside and get some air? Bela Lugosi: Bullshit! I'm ready now! Roll the camera!
Shelly: The first rule of eye makeup is that you can never wear enough blue eye shadow.
[making up the bald Dr. Tom to look like Bela Lugosi] Makeup Man Harry: Ed, what am I gonna do here. Edward D. Wood, Jr.: What do you mean? Makeup Man Harry: He has no hair. Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Gee, I never noticed that. Put a wig on him!
Brandon: [fighting with Bobby] The reason... the reason you haven't taken me home to your mother is... your mother with her makeup and her drinking, she's... she's in the closet too! Zack: They fight just like *real* people!
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