Jimmy: I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the republic of which it stands one nation under God indivisible with liberty and justice for all... [looks down and says faster] Jimmy: I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the republic of which it stands one nation under God indivisible.
Marv Loach: What department is that again? Kent Mansley: Frankly, I'm not at liberty to divulge the particulars of the agency I work for, and all that that implies. Marv Loach: You mean, national security? Kent Mansley: Let me put it this way. Every so often things happen that can't be rationalized in a conventional way. People wanna know their government has a response. I am that response.
Guard at Liberty Gate: [after catching James coming back into the camp after having snuck out] What were you doing out there? Staff Sergeant William James: Visiting a whorehouse. Guard at Liberty Gate: Okay. If I let you back in, will you tell me where it is exactly?
Sly: [sly has a plan to escape from babyco but it involves hiding in a moving cart of dirty diapers. He is about to jump into the cart when he sighs and says] Well give me liberty or give me death. [sly holds his nose and jumps into the cart of diapers and gags] Sly: I should've chosen death... ugh.
Cmndt. Dominique: We took the liberty of calling your tailor. We thought perhaps we would learn something. Regina Lambert: Did you? Cmndt. Dominique: Yes. Your dress is ready.
Liberty 24 Pilot: [as the President reaches Liberty Two Four] Liberty Two Four is changing call signs - Liberty Two Four is now Air Force One!
Will: Why shouldn't I work for the N.S.A.? That's a tough one, but I'll take a shot. Say I'm working at N.S.A. Somebody puts a code on my desk, something nobody else can break. Maybe I take a shot at it and maybe I break it. And I'm real happy with myself, 'cause I did my job well. But maybe that code was the location of some rebel army in North Africa or the Middle East. Once they have that location, they bomb the village where the rebels were hiding and fifteen hundred people I never met, never had no problem with, get killed. Now the politicians are sayin', "Oh, send in the Marines to secure the area" 'cause they don't give a shit. It won't be their kid over there, gettin' shot. Just like it wasn't them when their number got called, 'cause they were pullin' a tour in the National Guard. It'll be some kid from Southie takin' shrapnel in the ass. And he comes back to find that the plant he used to work at got exported to the country he just got back from. And the guy who put the shrapnel in his ass got his old job, 'cause he'll work for fifteen cents a day and no bathroom breaks. Meanwhile, he realizes the only reason he was over there in the first place was so we could install a government that would sell us oil at a good price. And, of course, the oil companies used the skirmish over there to scare up domestic oil prices. A cute little ancillary benefit for them, but it ain't helping my buddy at two-fifty a gallon. And they're takin' their sweet time bringin' the oil back, of course, and maybe even took the liberty of hiring an alcoholic skipper who likes to drink martinis and fuckin' play slalom with the icebergs, and it ain't too long 'til he hits one, spills the oil and kills all the sea life in the North Atlantic. So now my buddy's out of work and he can't afford to drive, so he's got to walk to the fuckin' job interviews, which sucks 'cause the shrapnel in his ass is givin' him chronic hemorrhoids. And meanwhile he's starvin', 'cause every time he tries to get a bite to eat, the only blue plate special they're servin' is North Atlantic scrod with Quaker State. So what did I think? I'm holdin' out for somethin' better. I figure fuck it, while I'm at it why not just shoot my buddy, take his job, give it to his sworn enemy, hike up gas prices, bomb a village, club a baby seal, hit the hash pipe and join the National Guard? I could be elected president.
Irv: Our Father, who art in Calgary, Bobsled be thy name. Thy kingdom come, gold medals won, on Earth as it is in Turn Seven. With Liberty and Justice for Jamaica and Haile Selassie. Amen.
Bill: Newspapers take more liberty with the fact than E! True Hollywood Story.
[Listening skeptically to German propaganda coming over a loudspeaker] Captain Miller: "The Statue of Liberty is kaput" - that's disconcerting.
Sam Witwicky: What is Sector 7? Answer me! Agent Simmons: I ask the questions round here, not you, young man! Mikaela: All right, how did you know about the aliens? Sam Witwicky: Where did you take my parents? Agent Simmons: I am not at liberty to discuss... [Sam snatches his badge away] Agent Simmons: Hey, you touch me, that's a federal offense! Sam Witwicky: [holding it up] "Do whatever you want and get away with it" badge, right? Agent Simmons: Brave now, all of a sudden with his big alien friends standing over there.
Dobel: I took the liberty a couple weeks ago of ordering you a little present. Jerry Falk: What? Dobel: Well, they're having a sale here on surplus Russian Army riffles. Jerry Falk: What? Dobel: Well suppose you're home one night, you know, in bed masturbating and some guys try to break in. You need protection. Jerry Falk: No! I just dial 9-1-1. Dobel: Have you ever dialed 9-1-1? It's like trying to get a mortgage.
Lisa Simpson: This town is just one piece of trash away from a toxic nightmare! But I knew you wouldn't listen. So I took the liberty of pouring water from the lake in all your drinking glasses! [everyone spits out their water in disgust] Moe: See, this is why we should hate kids!
Guy: So where are you from? Alan Joseph Zuckerman: Forest Park. Guy: [surprised] Forest Park? Alan Joseph Zuckerman: Yeah, off Liberty Heights. Guy: That's, uh, Jewish, right? Alan Joseph Zuckerman: [nervous pause] Damn near, yeah... Seems, uh, more's moving in too, y'know? So it's really... it's really getting that way.
Gladys: [after installing a lot of traps] What about this one, this Depelter Turbo? Dwayne: That's a contraband item, ma'am, as it is illegal in every state, [with his hand over his heart] Dwayne: except Texas. Gladys: I don't care if this violates the Geneva Conventions, I want it. Dwayne: I thought you might, so I took the liberty of installing it for you. [as he tosses a stuffed bear in it] Dwayne: Adios, animal infenstation. RJ: [it traps it] AHHHHH! Gladys: [we see it in a cage, with outside burned off] Ohhh, very nice.
The Emperor: [to the Senate] In order to ensure our security and continuing stability, the Republic will be reorganized into the first Galactic Empire, for a safe and secure society which I assure you will last for ten thousand years. [Senate fills with enormous applause] Padmé: [to Bail Organa] So this is how liberty dies... with thunderous applause.
Jim Norton: I think the Statue of Liberty could advertise douche products: "Just because your standing in water all day doesn't mean you have to smell like fish."
Sarah Silverman: Jesus is magic, because he turned water into wine. I think he made the statue of liberty disappear in the 80s or something.
Mac MacGuff: Liberty Bell, if you put one more Baco on that potato, I'm gonna kick your little monkey butt.
Jonathan Lundy: Where the hell have you been? I took the liberty of ordering you another Scotch. Daniel: Bully!
Scary Caller #30: How can a slut be beautiful? The Mona Lisa is beautiful, the Statue of Liberty is beautiful, the Grand Canyon, the first day of spring, a new fallen snow-that's beauty, but a slut is just slutty, right?
Victor Cardell: What would you think the Statue of Liberty was if you happened upon it standing in a field, no explanatory plaque included?
Anita Levine: Guys, I want you to meet my fabulous friend from college. Her name is Papaya Smith. Taylor Donohue: Hi. Liberty Lass: You know, papaya is a fruit in Hawaii. Taylor Donohue: Who knew?
Frank Dixon: Okay, so let's say this bag of potato chips is Krakozhia and this apple is the Liberty Rebels. Okay? [smashes the bag with the apple spraying chips all over Viktor] Frank Dixon: No more Krakozhia!
Josh Whitney: I made it all up. Alison: Even the Liberty Maid? Josh Whitney: Yes, I got your hair and red hat off a juice box. Alison: Lord almighty, I've met my maker.
Tour Guide: Quick bit of history for you. The Statue of Liberty was actually a gift from the French. It was created and built in France, disassembled, shipped over to New York, and reassembled here. The Statue was dedicated on October 28th, 1886. I hope you're taking notes, 'cause there's going to be a pop quiz soon.
General Hummel: Did they bother to tell you who I am and why I'm doing this or are they just using you like they do everybody else? John Mason: All I know is that you were big in Vietnam, I saw the highlights on television. General Hummel: Then you probably have no idea what it means to lead some of the finest men on God's earth into combat and then watch their memories get betrayed by their own fucking government. John Mason: I don't quite see how you cherish the memory of the dead by killing another million. And, this is not combat, it's an act of lunacy, General Sir. Personally, I think you're a fucking idiot. General Hummel: "The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." Thomas Jefferson. John Mason: "Patriotism is a virtue of the vicious," according to Oscar Wilde. [Hummel strikes him, and he falls to his knees] John Mason: Thank you for making my point. General Hummel: Where are the guidance chips? [Points his gun at Mason's head] General Hummel: WHERE ARE THE GUIDANCE CHIPS? John Mason: I've destroyed them. General Hummel: That was a bad move, soldier.
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