Record Company Executive: Your fans are church folk, Johnny. Christians. They don't wanna hear you singing to a bunch of murderers and rapists, tryin' to cheer 'em up. Johnny Cash: [pause] Well, they're not Christians, then.
Derek Dietl: Susan! Susan Murphy: Derek? Derek Dietl: I've been thinking long and hard about what happened last night, and I just want to to know, I forgive you. Susan Murphy: You forgive me? Derek Dietl: Of course. It wasn't your fault you got hit by a meteorite and ruined everything. And I say maybe you didn't ruin everything, because I just got a call from New York. They offered me network. All I have to do is give them an exclusive interview with you. Susan Murphy: Really? Derek Dietl: Yes. I get my dream job, and you get your dream guy. It's a win-win for Team Dietl. Susan Murphy: Derek, that's... amazing. Is the camera running? Derek Dietl: Of course. Susan Murphy: [Picks up Derek] Good, because I wouldn't want any of your fans to miss this. This is Susan Murphy saying goodbye, Derek! [Flicks him up in the air] Susan Murphy: B.O.B., could you...? B.O.B.: [after catching Derek] Derek, you're a selfish jerk, and guess what? I've met someone else. She's lime green, she has 14 little chunks of pineapple inside of her, and she is everything I deserve in life! I'm happy now, Derek, without you. It's over! B.O.B.: [to cameraman] Turn it off.
[title card] Title card/crawl: The year is 1998 and it is a period of galactic civil war. Scratch that. There's no civil war. That would be crazy. However, the past fifteen years have been a dark time for Star Wars fans. Title card/crawl: But there is hope. A new Star Wars film is on the horizon. In 199 days, 3 hours, 33 minutes and 29 seconds the most anticipated movie of all time will be released. Title card/crawl: In the remote state of Ohio, two best friends and lifelong Star Wars fans have drifted apart. Little do they know that on Halloween night, their paths will cross again... Title card/crawl: Ever wonder why these words are flying? Maybe aliens in another galaxy will one day read this and think WTF? Title card/crawl: sent from my iPhone.
Danny: [after a boy goes missing at Yankee Stadium] This would've never happened at Shea. Vivian: It's so sad how bitter Mets fans are.
Ranch Wilder: I'd say the fans seem a little bouncier today, wouldn't you, Wally? Wally: That's right, Ranch. As we saw last game... Ranch Wilder: [Turns off Wally's mike for the second time] Easy Wally, less is more.
Chaz: [to Star Wars fans dressed as Boba Fett] All right, let's move it, Boba Fags. End of the line.
Bobby Rayburn: At least you're not one of those diehard, you know, baseball fans, you know, really. Gil Renard: Why's that? Bobby Rayburn: Because those guys are losers. Gil Renard: Aren't the fans what it's all about? Bobby Rayburn: Sheee-it! I'll tell you something, man, the fans are like women. When you're hitting, they love you, and when you're not, they just as soon spit on you as look at you!
[last lines] Linda Lee: Three weeks before the opening of Enter the Dragon, the movie that would bring him into international fame, Bruce fell into a mysterious coma and died. He was 32. Thousands of fans have gathered in Hong Kong for the funeral. I buried him in America so he can be close to us. There are many people that want to know the way he died, I want to remember the way he lived.
[talking about Lost fans posting theories on the internet] Greg Fitzsimmons: It's really helpful to the writers, because they go online and they take the theories and put them into the script, because they've run out of stuff.
Paula: [reading to her father] ?the Mighty Mets stormed their locker room shortly after nine o'clock on their night to remember. Released from bondage and ridicule after seven destitute seasons, they raised the roof of Shea Stadium - while their fans attempted to dismantle it - in one of the loudest, wildest victory celebrations in baseball history
Dane Cook: Ah, fans of crime.
Jake Szufnarowski: If it was fat Gov't Mule fans maybe 600-hundred of 'em. If it was skinny little Ska kids we could fit eight or 900-hundred of 'em. I really wanted to institute a pay by waistline policy.
Stephen King: [on Misery] I have met a few fans whose... their elevators don't go all the way up.
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