Dating Quotes and Sayings

Dating Quotes Topics

John Tucker:
So you're lab partners with Kate, right? We talk. What's her deal?
Scott:
Yeah, I don't know. I don't think she's your type.
John Tucker:
Girl is my type.
Scott:
Alright, well then maybe you're not her type. She's into stuff like old school Elvis Costello, she listens to obscure podcasts, she reads Dave Eggers. You know, she's deep, man.
John Tucker:
Dude, I'm deep. I'm dating the poetry club.

Jack:
Hey, George... How does this relationship nonsense usually work?
George:
Usually, you go on a couple of dates, see if you like each other. Eventually you have sex.
Jack:
Right. I, uh... I sort of skipped the whole dating thing. So what then?
George:
And then, if you're happy with the action, you become boyfriend and girlfriend. It's really fun for, like, three months, and then you realize it's work. Then you dump her. Or not.
Jack:
Okay, let's say not.
George:
You move in together.
Jack:
I did that.
George:
Right. Well... Then you get married. You start your trajectory of acquisitions. Knives, forks, juicer, barbecue. You move to the 'burbs. You buy a house. You pop some kids out. You fight, you cheat, you separate, divorce, you split the shit, and see the kids on weekends. Then you start all over again.
Jack:
It all sounds so promising.
George:
It's just an outline, Jack.

Tags: Relationship Quotes Dating Quotes Kids Quotes Art Quotes Boyfriend Quotes

Heather:
So I talked to John. He was sweet. He felt bad for you. He said that you were jealous because we share something special. Something that we don't have to label because...
Beth:
[interrupting] Because it's our unspoken bond and I just love how secure you are?
Carrie:
And it hurts me to question it, because...
Heather, Beth, Carrie:
[at the same time] ... YOU'RE THE ONLY GIRL FOR ME?
Heather:
Damn! He said the same thing to all of us!
Beth:
Figures. He makes up with us and he hooks up with us...
Carrie:
[interrupts, whispers] You guys hooked up?
Beth:
John and I share something special.
Carrie:
Oh what, that they been both in your pants?
Beth:
We share a vegan/nonviolent outlook on life.
Heather:
[under her breath, coughs] Hippie slut.
Beth:
[sarcastic] Oh nice, Heather. It's not like everyone doesn't know that little Miss Cheerleader brings it on.
Carrie:
What, you too?
Heather:
John and I belong together. He is the team captain and I am the head cheerleader.
Beth:
Oh, I'm sorry, what kind of cheerleader?
Carrie:
Oh, like he'd take either of you two seriously?
Beth:
Do not lump me with her!
Heather:
Oh so what, you're now better than me?
Kate:
Shut up.
Heather, Beth:
[peeved] What?
Kate:
Sorry.
Heather:
You got something to say?
Kate:
No, it's none of my business. [pause]
Kate:
Okay, let me guess. Does he always use pet names like "Baby" and "Sweetheart?" Yeah, it's not out of affection, it's so he won't mix up your names. And he's all about an unspoken bond or something special, but never about a relationship. And the whole arrangement was your idea, so you feel guilty that he cheated.
Heather:
Oh my God, you're dating John too?
Kate:
No, I knew a guy like him... Skip.

Tags: Love Quotes Dating Quotes Lent Quotes Cure Quotes Love Quotes

Joey:
Michael, you have to seize this moment. The love between two nerds is a rare and fragile thing.
Michael:
I want to. I can't go against the rules without a motion being passed.
Joey:
So, I'll make a motion.
Michael:
You're not a member. There's an approval process.
Joey:
Well, I motion you suspend it on account of me being the sole payer of rent for the book club's headquarters.
Michael:
I second the motion. The motion is passed
Joey:
I motion for a presidential exemption to the no-dating rule.
Michael:
I second the motion. The motion is passed.
Joey:
I motion that you and me eat that entire ice cream cake right now.
Michael:
Motion denied.
Joey:
Mr. Chairman, you're out of order!

Tags: Love Quotes Dating Quotes Approval Quotes Love Quotes Right Quotes

Kemo:
Sarah Marshall.
Peter Bretter:
Yes. How did you know I was dating Sarah Marshall?
Kemo:
Dwayne told me. Chuck told me. Even Rachel told me. I heard about it from everybody. You gotta stop talking about it. It's like "the Sopranos." It's *over*. Find a new show.

Tags: Dating Quotes Talking Quotes

Miranda:
I'm dating skid-marks guy. When your boyfriend is so comfortable that he cannot be bothered to wipe his ass, there's a problem.

Tags: Dating Quotes Boyfriend Quotes

Dr. Desmond Forest Oates:
What direction do you think "left" is? See, because if you go with your instinct and reverse it, I think we have something happening. How difficult is this? I'm so alone, I think.
Jessica:
I am trying. You are intimidating me.
Dr. Desmond Forest Oates:
Well you are FRIGHTENING me. You understand that? How do you get dressed in the morning? Do you have people come in, or do you just lie in state?

Tags: People Quotes Dating Quotes People Quotes Direction Quotes Instinct Quotes

Frank Berkman:
Mom's dating Ivan.
Bernard Berkman:
Really? Ivan, back there, Ivan?
Frank Berkman:
Yeah.
Bernard Berkman:
Are you sure? Why didn't you say something? Why is your mother dating all these jocks? Very uninteresting men.
Frank Berkman:
Ivan is very interesting.
Bernard Berkman:
Ivan's not a serious possibility for your mother.
Frank Berkman:
I think he is.
Bernard Berkman:
I don't want to badmouth Ivan. But I don't know what Joan is thinking.
Frank Berkman:
I think Ivan...
Bernard Berkman:
Frank.

Tags: Dating Quotes Mother Quotes Possibility Quotes Us Quotes

Florentino Ariza:
[updating his diary of conquests] Number 2: The widow Nazareth... Wouldn't stop talking about her dead husband... Very disturbing !

Tags: Dating Quotes Talking Quotes

Gurkin:
[updating his blog] Does anyone know another word for "douchebaggery"? I don't want to use it a third time.

Tags: Dating Quotes

Doumer:
You're incredible, Ryback. It's a shame you're not cooking for *us*. [Jordan shoots Doumer in the back]
Casey Ryback:
[to Jordan] Next thing I know, you'll be dating musicians.

Tags: Dating Quotes Shame Quotes Cooking Quotes

Steve Langston:
So, the last time I saw you, you were Homecoming Queen, dating Mr. Perfect, the Homecoming King - then - what happened?
Amie Cooper:
It was five years ago, I was still dating Mr. Perfect - we went to the lake with some friends to celebrate Fourth of July weekend - you know, race boats, get drunk - act like a bunch of crazy people.
Steve Langston:
Done that a to time or two.
Amie Cooper:
We were sitting on the bank watching the fireworks. I remember, it was especially clear that night. The stars were out, Jimmy Buffet was playing on the radio - and while we were waiting for the grand finale, someone threw their own fireworks in to our camp. One of Brian's friends yelled out to warn us, but - I turned and looked right into it. There was this bright flash, then the most unbelievable explosion you could ever imagine. Everything shook - then everything went black.
Steve Langston:
Dear God...
Amie Cooper:
The only thing I felt was the - ringing in my ears. That was all I could feel for a long, long time.

Tags: Friends Quotes Act Quotes Dating Quotes Heir Quotes Race Quotes

Robert James Sr.:
[after Tia dreams she and Neesee are getting married, Robert discovers her packed bags at the door] Tia, why...why are you getting so worked up over a dream?
Tia Jewel:
Because it's not a dream, it's reality. I marry you, I marry Neesee. I guess that makes sense because it feels like I've been dating her for the past year and a half. I go to school, she's there. I come home, she's here. I go to your office, she's there. And now, we go to sleep, and boom, there she is, right in our bed.
Robert James Sr.:
Tia, I don't enjoy having Neesee around all the time. But she and I have a son together.
Tia Jewel:
I know, and I love him. But I guess I didn't realize how much his mother was going to be a part of our lives...until now.
Robert James Sr.:
What do you mean, until now? It's always been like this.
Tia Jewel:
Not really. Because, baby, now she's in your dreams and showing up in mine.
Robert James Sr.:
Look, baby, I know what you're saying, okay? But, this is not...you're overreact...
Tia Jewel:
When you asked me to marry you, I just took that ring, put it on, and I said yes, because I love you so, so much. But I guess I didn't take the time to think how things would really be between us. And when I say "us," I mean ALL of us. And baby, you didn't either.

Tags: Love Quotes Dating Quotes Past Quotes Art Quotes Dreams Quotes

Lucy Ackerman:
You know, I sort of like this dating thing, I'm sort of getting the things here. What I do is, sit back and watch as these strange men try to impress you in weird and stupid ways and then... and then you pick the least disgusting one, I guess.

Tags: Men Quotes Dating Quotes Men Quotes Press Quotes

Max Conners:
[considering Tensy as their next mark] Hmm...
Page Conners:
Not "hmm"! I am not dating the walking dead!

Tags: Age Quotes Dating Quotes Heir Quotes

David:
I went out with this girl for four months and it was the greatest greatest thing in my life. Until she went down on this guy in an Escalade, I think. And, you know, instead of, like, saying, "Okay, what am I doing that caused this behavior?" I dumped her. Stupid decision. I spent the last two years of my life regretting it.
Andy Stitzer:
Well, why don't you get her back right now?
David:
Oh, cause she's dating this pot dealer. Stupid, horrible decision. But, hey, that's her journey, you know. I gotta respect that. She wants to be some immature little bitch and blow everybody, that's... that's love, man.
Andy Stitzer:
It sounds horrible.
David:
Of course it's horrible. It's suffering and it's pain and it's... You know, you lose weight and then you put back on weight, and then you, you know, you call them a bunch of times and you try and email, and then they move or they change their email, but that's just love.

Tags: Change Quotes Dating Quotes Heir Quotes Pain Quotes Weight Quotes

Benjamin Coffin III:
[about Maureen] Still dating her?
Mark:
Last month I was dumped.
Benjamin Coffin III:
She's got a new man?
Mark:
Well, no.
Benjamin Coffin III:
What's his name?
Mark, Roger:
Joanne.

Tags: Dating Quotes

Mutt Williams:
[Looking at Indy and Marion] No! No, he was Britsh! My dad was an RAF Pilot; he was a war hero; not some school teacher!
Marion Ravenwood:
No, sweetheart! Collin was your step father. We started dating 3 months after you were born! He was a good man!
Indiana Jones:
Wait... wait... wait a minute! Collin? As in Collin Williams? Ha! You, you married him? I introduced you!
Marion Ravenwood:
I think you gave up your vote on who I married, when you decided to break it off a week before the wedding!
Indiana Jones:
You and I both knew Marion, that it wasn't gonna work out!
Marion Ravenwood:
Then why didn't you ever talk to me about it?
Indiana Jones:
Because, we never had an argument I won!
Dovchenko:
Oh, for the love of God! Shut the hell up!
Marion Ravenwood:
Didn't you ever wonder why Ox stopped writing, he hated that you walked out on me!
Mutt Williams:
Would you two just stop!
Indiana Jones:
Yeah, Marion! Let's not let the kid see mom and dad fight!
Mutt Williams:
You're not my dad, alright!
Indiana Jones:
You bet I am; and I've got news for you; you're gonna go back and finish school!
Mutt Williams:
Oh really! What happend to there's not a damn thing wrong, with you kid, don't let anybody ealse tell you any different! You don't remember saying that!
Indiana Jones:
That was before I was your father!
Mutt Williams:
You're not my father!
Marion Ravenwood:
[Dovchenko gets up] Oh yes, he is your father!
Indiana Jones:
You should've told me about the kid, Marion; I had a right to know!
Marion Ravenwood:
[Dovchenko gags Marions mouth] You vanished, after that!
Indiana Jones:
I wrote!
Marion Ravenwood:
A year later! By then, Mutt was born, and I was married!
Indiana Jones:
Why in the bother did you tell me now?
Marion Ravenwood:
Because I thought we were gonna die!
Indiana Jones:
Not yet! [Indy and Mutt start kicking Dovchenko until he falls over]
Mutt Williams:
[Mutt empties knife out of shoe, and throws it to Indy, and it lands on Indy's shoulder, and drops to Indy's hand] Got it? [Mutt hears rip]
Mutt Williams:
Oh shit! [Indy cuts himself loose, then Mutt]

Tags: Love Quotes Dating Quotes Hell Quotes Saying Quotes School Quotes

Bobby Keough:
Well, she's black, Eldon, that's why I don't talk about her.
Det. Sgt. Eldon Perry Jr.:
Oh, you be dating a sistah!
Bobby Keough:
Yeah.
Det. Sgt. Eldon Perry Jr.:
I didn't know you were into ebony and ivory.
Bobby Keough:
I do'nt wanna hear a bunch of black jokes, Hey, no I really don't.
Det. Sgt. Eldon Perry Jr.:
Hey amigo, you think I care about the size, shape, color or political party of some sweet thing you're rolling around with?

Tags: Dating Quotes Party Quotes

Tiger:
I think she needs her space.
Anderson:
Yeah... Well, welcome to dating the alien abducted.

Tags: Dating Quotes Needs Quotes

Connor:
I think I oughta go over there and kick his ass.
Danielle:
That's great, because I've always dreamed of dating the expelled guy.
Courtney:
Expelled guys rock!

Tags: Dating Quotes

Eddie Bichon:
If you didn't want to get married why did you?
Grace:
Why'd you ask me?
Eddie Bichon:
Why'd I ask you?
Grace:
Yeah, you're the one who hasn't even stopped dating yet!

Tags: Dating Quotes

Elliott:
You don't understand. Joey is gorgeous. I am... funny-looking. In the gay world, there's a caste system no less rigid than the Hindus'. It would be like a Brahmin dating an untouchable.

Tags: Dating Quotes Gay Quotes

Megan Dayton:
You're going to get a heart, I *know*. And you'll be able to do all the things you never could before. That's what you've gotta concentrate on. Think of riding a bike, and going to Italy... and dating *really* handsome men. *That*, I know, has to happen for one of us.
Grace Briggs:
I'm getting a new heart, not a new ass.

Tags: Dating Quotes Race Quotes Grace Quotes

Ray Gleason:
So, you dating yet?
Timmy:
I'm eleven.
Ray Gleason:
Yeah, I guess you should give it some time. I myself didn't start dating until I was eleven and a half.

Tags: Dating Quotes Self Quotes Art Quotes

Lydia:
I have never been through a dating period.
Anne Napolitano:
It's a disgusting process. You haven't missed a thing.

Tags: Dating Quotes

Samantha:
You dated Mr. Big. I'm dating Mr. Too Big.

Tags: Dating Quotes

[At a Dating Game-like game show]
Brandi:
Second suitor: if we were making whoopee, what sounds would you make?
Brodie:
Wait, what's whoopee?
Brandi:
You know, being intimate.
Brodie:
What? Like fucking?

Tags: Dating Quotes

B.O.B.:
So long, Derek! Good luck getting over me.
Susan Murphy:
Uh, B.O.B., I'm the one Derek's not going to get over.
B.O.B.:
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait? You were dating Derek too? That two timing jerk!

Tags: Dating Quotes Luck Quotes

Michael Makeshift:
I saw two of my ex-girlfriends on Oprah. One had become a man. The other was dating him.

Tags: Friends Quotes Dating Quotes Girlfriends Quotes Friends Quotes

[after intimidating the entire bar]
Sammy:
I swear he's nothing without that badge and gun.
Detective Gino Felino NYPD:
Really? Let me show you something. [unloads and drops gun]
Detective Gino Felino NYPD:
There's my gun. [holds up police badge]
Detective Gino Felino NYPD:
And here's my badge. Fair game now, ok? This is your trophy, this is your trophy! Come and get it.
Sammy:
I offer five thousand for that badge.

Tags: Dating Quotes Police Quotes

Chun Li:
[reporting on GNT World News] This is Chung-Li Zang with GNT News. A.N. forces are consolidating their hold on Shadaloo City today after a night of skirmishing that secured this key Southeast Asian port. But these soldiers aren't celebrating just yet. They know that defeating the ragtag city militia is one thing. Defeating the heavily-armed forces of General M. Bison is quite another. The Allied Nations forces know that they are dealing with a power-mad dictator, a dictator whose drug money has equipped his army with high-tech weaponry which some intelligence experts fear is equal to anything in the industrialized world. It's been only twenty-four hours since this dangerous and unpredictable warlord seized sixty-three Allied Nations relief workers from a village north of here. This self-styled general's ransom demands? An astonishing twenty billion dollars! Meanwhile, the location of the sixty-three hostages remains unknown. Of the fifteen Allied Nations troops assigned to guard the missing relief workers, twelve are confirmed dead and three are missing. Their whereabouts? Also unknown.

Tags: Money Quotes Age Quotes Dating Quotes Day Quotes Fear Quotes

Gramma:
I don't see why you're so set on beating boys up when you could be dating them.

Tags: Dating Quotes Boys Quotes

Patrick:
Mary, you want to go out sometime?
Mary:
What? Are you going to take me out on your "scooter"?
Patrick:
Come on, I'm like, totally adorable, besides, it would drive Hilary Faye crazy.
Mary:
I can't. I'm... not dating right now.
Patrick:
What about tomorrow night? Will you be dating then?

Tags: Dating Quotes Will Quotes Right Quotes

Rifat Maroun:
[reading the mail] Wow. Your mother's dating Colin Powell now. Good. I hope he marries her. What a hypocrite. How are you supposed to learn anything anyhow?
Rifat Maroun:
I have to go to Thena's...

Tags: Dating Quotes Reading Quotes Hope Quotes

Woman:
And now I've got to go out there and start dating weights, and I don't even know what dating weights mean, it's all metrics now.

Tags: Dating Quotes Art Quotes

[the C.L.I.T. is being discussed on TV]
Holden:
Nights like this... I miss dating a lesbian.

Tags: Dating Quotes

Patrick Bateman:
Pumpkin, you're dating an asshole.

Tags: Dating Quotes

Roland T. Flakfizer:
And she looks like she's about fifteen.
Lazlo:
No, no, no.
Roland T. Flakfizer:
Okay, fourteen then. In fact I know she's fourteen, because I was dating her a year ago.

Tags: Act Quotes Dating Quotes Land Quotes

Lilly:
Is your mom dating an undertaker?

Tags: Dating Quotes

Patrick Bateman:
Pumpkin, you're dating the biggest dickweed in New York. Pumpkin, you're dating a tumbling, tumbling dickweed.
Courtney Rawlinson:
Patrick, stop calling me pumpkin, OK?

Tags: Dating Quotes

Sadie:
You do realize that Calvin's a girl?
Shuli:
And? I want to see if she will come to Sacramento with us.
Anna:
[sarcastic] This isn't a dating service, you know.
Sadie:
Sorry, Shuli. Last time anyone checked, you liked men.
Shuli:
Who said I didn't? Jesus, you dykes are such closed-minded bitches.

Tags: Dating Quotes Will Quotes Time Quotes

[Jack knows that Richard is dating a younger woman, but doesn't know that it's actually Monica]
Jack Geller:
Come on, tell us.
Jack's friend:
Yeah. Is she really 20?
Richard:
I'm not telling you guys anything.
Jack Geller:
Come on, Rich. It's my birthday, let me live vicariously.
Ross:
Dad, you really don't want to do that.
Jack Geller:
Ahh, what's a little mid-life crisis between friends?
Richard:
Jack, would you let it go?
Jack Geller:
Look, I know what you're going through. When I turned 50 I got my Porsche. You... you got your own speedster.
Richard:
Guys, seriously, it's not like that.
Jack Geller:
Tell you what, maybe one of these weekends you can borrow the car and I could...
Ross:
Dad, I beg you not to finish that sentence.

Tags: Dating Quotes Crisis Quotes Life Quotes

Michael Corben:
I'm real sorry. I don't know what to say, y'know?
Herb Corben:
You don't know what to say? I'll tell you what to say. How 'bout, "Sorry, Mom and Dad, I would've liked to have graduated high school, but I couldn't really fit it into my dating and partying schedule," huh? Or, how 'bout, "Sorry but I was too busy doing jack shit instead of going to my French class!"
Marge:
Herb, take a pill.

Tags: Dating Quotes

[Explaining why she was with a guy the night before]
Gracie Hart:
Yeah, I was dating him for a while because he told me he had an incurable disease...
All Girls:
ooh.
Gracie Hart:
Yeah, I didn't realize it was stupidity.

Tags: Dating Quotes Night Quotes

Jill Watson:
Sam Loves me, and Sam has always loved me, and you know that Sam was never actually dating me, but he remained celibate, the entire time that we weren't together? He would write me notes that I wouldn't respond to because I was dedicated to bobby, that would just say "I'm not fucking anyone... but you in my head". And I thought, after awhile, how can I just reject that? That is just really, really, really dedication.

Tags: Dating Quotes Time Quotes

Barry:
I don't know, Jeremy. Speed dating is for desperate people.
Jeremy:
I know. That's why it's perfect for you.

Tags: Dating Quotes

Monica:
I'm dating a guy whose pool I once peed in.
Richard:
I didn't need to know that.

Tags: Dating Quotes

Dr. Wesley McClaren:
[to Holly while entering the reception room at the hospital] Get your homework done and if there are any guys in here no flirting. No dating until you are 40.

Tags: Dating Quotes Work Quotes

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