College Quotes and Sayings

College Quotes Topics

Announcer:
Geritol. America's #1 tonic. Geritol, the fast-acting, high-potentcy tonic, that helps you feel... stronger... fast... presents the exciting quiz program...”Twenty-One." Brought to you by NBC, The National Broadcasting Company, broadcasting nationally coast to coast, from New York to Los Angeles, from Seattle to St. Petersburg... via a vast network of affiliates crisscrossing the country. Coming up next, "Twenty-One," starring master of ceremonies Jack Barry! [music cues build dramatically]
Announcer:
Two players racing to score 21 points... each in a soundproof television studio, not knowing the other one's score... with $500 riding on each point... as they both play...”Twenty-One!" [lively theme music plays]
Announcer:
And here's your host... Jack Barry! [the audience applauds as Jack runs on to the stage and stands behind his podium]
Jack Barry:
[looking at us] Good evening. I'm Jack Barry. Due to a series of ties, Herbert Stempel, our 29-year-old ex-G.I. college student, must play at $3,000 a point, which means that in a few brief minutes, he can either win as much as $100,000 - the most money won on television to date - or lose everything he's won in the last eight weeks. [as Jack continues to speak, Herbert and his opponent wait to be introduced]
Stempel's opponent:
You nervous?
Herbie Stemple:
[chuckles as he clean's his glasses] It's only money.
Jack Barry:
Isolated in their soundproof studios, neither player is aware of the other's score. I've been assured by our friends at the encyclopedia... that they've concocted some real brain-breakers this week, so we'll find out in the next 30 minutes... if the unstumpable Herbert Stempel can be stumped. Could I have the questions, please? [a drumroll plays as the questions are handed to Jack by a stagehand]
Jack Barry:
Thank you, gentlemen. Remember the questions on "Twenty-One" are secured each week in a Manhattan bank vault 'til just before show time. So right now, let's meet Herbert Stempel and his challenger as Geritol, America's #1 tonic, presents "Twenty-One." [a fanfare plays and the audience applauds as Herbert and his opponent make their entrances]

Myron Larabee:
They sit there and use subliminal messages to suck your children's' minds out! And I know what I'm talking about because I went to junior college for a semester and I studied psychology so I'm right in there, I know what's going on. They make the kids feel like garbage and you, the father, who's working 24/7 delivering mail so you can make an alimony payment to a woman that slept with everybody at the post office, but me! And then when you get the toy, it breaks and you can't fix it because it's little cheap plastic!

Tags: Age Quotes College Quotes Kids Quotes Mail Quotes Man Quotes

Alonzo Harris:
All right, when's the last time you did a felony stop?
Jake Hoyt:
Uh, couple weeks ago?
Alonzo Harris:
Good, you need practice.
Jake Hoyt:
They look like college kids.
Alonzo Harris:
They're gonna get their education today. I don't want the Brady Bunch grabbin' glass. You take the back, I'll take the front.

Tags: Education Quotes College Quotes Education Quotes Heir Quotes Time Quotes

Chris Berman:
From Champs to chumps. Just six months ago, The Texas State Fighting Armadillos were billed as the greatest college football team in history, and now, they are history. Yesterday, the commision slapped Texas State with a staggering list of infractions including recruiting violations, steroid abuse, illegal payments to players and , of course, grade tampering. To where these guys are going, their yearbook photos will be used as mugshots. Joining us tonight is our guest commentator, the legendary Ed "Straight Arrow" Gennero, the man who once threw five All-Americans off his football team for taking money from boosters, but still won the Cotton Bowl. Thanks for joining us tonight, coach.
Coach Gennero:
Good to be here, Chris.
Chris Berman:
Coach, what's the latest on the Armadillos?
Coach Gennero:
Well, Chris, the penalty handed down to Texas State will set an example for the future of College Football.
Chris Berman:
What happened to the players?
Coach Gennero:
All the players from the old team have been expelled and all the coaches have been fired.
Chris Berman:
Where will they get their new players?
Coach Gennero:
Their new players must be real students. No more scholarships, no more monkey business, no more special favors or else no more football.

Tags: Money Quotes Actions Quotes College Quotes Fighting Quotes Heir Quotes

Sean Dunne:
Tough loss tonight. Nine innings, six hits, five runs, three walks, eight strikeouts and one big mistake. I was talking to one of the scouts, the guy in the suspenders. He's from the Phillies. He was curious about your college career. I made up a few stories.
Ryan:
That's great, Dad.
Sean Dunne:
I'm trying to help here, hotshot. Most important thing in your life, you don't want my help? Not interested?
Ryan:
I got some place to be! [he runs away]
Sean Dunne:
Chasing some Shore Road princess who's trying to get Daddy's attention by screwing the lawn boy.

Tags: College Quotes Help Quotes Talking Quotes Attention Quotes Loss Quotes

Holly Hamilton:
It's nothing. It's just, I'm going through my teenage years. And that's confusing. I'm confused about who I am and what my purpose is in life. What college I should go to. If I should even go to college. I'm trying to resist peer pressure to do all sorts of things that I know I shouldn't do, but some of them I kind of want to do. If you know what I mean? I'm considering getting my nose pierced, and my belly button, and nine other parts of my body. But my mom said she would totally kill me if I did that, so now I'm just thinking about getting a tattoo on my back. But it wouldn't really be considered my back, because it would be so low, that you wouldn't even be able to see it. Unless I wore my jeans low enough. I'm really confused.

Tags: Age Quotes College Quotes Teenage Quotes Purpose Quotes Thinking Quotes

Katherine:
Oh my god, I have to tell you about this reall artsy party this French-Canadian girl in my acting class threw. Like everyone there they wrote like poems or novellas or something. So this one college guy, he was asian, he gets up with his little leather portfolio with a satin ribbon to tie it shut and he's gonna read his poetry. But before he starts reading, he tells us about his fascinations with the human body and he says what fascinates him even more is what comes out of the human body. [sighs to her french fries]
Katherine:
I know I'm really lactose intolerant but I really wish these had cheese on them. Anyway, evidentally he's tasted everything that's come out of his body except shit and he says he'll probably taste that one day too. And then he reads a poem about "shit" so I'm thinking, "Okay, this guy really likes shit," right? And then he keeps reading and he reads 17 poems all about shit. 17! I'm not kidding. And he's talking about the smells and the colors and the farting... Gabe, can you pass me the ketchup? Thanks. Anyway, I was so relieved when he got tired of reading. Then this ethnic woman stands up, she was like Native American or Pilipino, I can never really tell the difference, she didn't have a poem to read so she tells us about a problem that she's having. A sex problem. She says that there's like some force that's making her screw around all the time. All these guys are after her and I mean, she's not what I would call sexy. Well, not that I'm into women that way, but I can tell when a woman's sexy. I mean, she's not what I would call a skank or anything, she's just not what I would call sexy, that's all. So, anyway, this is really funny [chuckles]
Katherine:
, I drank soo much homemade ice tea that I really had to pee right in the middle of her story, right? So I get up, I go to the bathroom, but the bathroom door's locked. So I'm kind of standing there looking at the wallpaper, which is really kind of giving me a headache. Then all of a sudden the toilet flushes, the door opens and the "shit guy" walks out and he's smiling. And not one of those like polite acknowledgement smiles, but he's like SMILING like he's happy about something and all of a sudden I didn't have to pee anymore.

Tags: Women Quotes Men Quotes Acting Quotes Class Quotes College Quotes

Gym Teacher:
Evan, get into the game.
Evan:
Kick it over... to me.
Gym Teacher:
Seth, get off the field!
Evan:
Dude, get out of here. There gonna make me run laps again.
Seth:
Dude, just fuckin' listen ok. Jules and her stupid fuckin' friend came up to me and they ask me to buy her alcohol. But not just her, for her whole party. You know what that means? By some divine miracle we were paired up and she actually thought of me. Thought of me enough to decide that I was the guy she would trust with the whole funness of her party. She wants to fuck me, she wants my dick in and around her mouth.
Evan:
Did you ever think that she's just using you to get her alcohol? She doesn't want your dick?
Seth:
No, she's got an older brother and she could've asked him but she asked me. She looked me in the eyes and said 'Seth, Momma's making a pubi salad and I need some Seth's Own dressing.' She's D.T.F. - down to fuck man. P and Vagi, she wants to [kicks soccer ball]
Seth:
fuck man! Tonight is a night that fucking is an actual possibility.
Evan:
You just sound like an idiot, you're not gonna be able to sleep with her man.
Seth:
No... dude, I don't want to talk a lot of shit OK. But she's gonna be at the party, and she's gonna be drunk, and she likes me at least a little, enough to get with me. At the very least I'll make out with her, two weeks hand job, month blow job, whatever whatever. And then, I make her my girlfriend. And I've got like two solid months of sex. By the time college rolls around I'll be like the Iron Chef of pounding vaj.
Evan:
K can you just get out of hear and we'll talk about this later?
Greg the Soccer Player:
What the fuck Evan we're down two points!
Evan:
Fuckin' calm down Greg, it's soccer, it's soccer.
Greg the Soccer Player:
Fuck you man.
Seth:
Hey Greg, why don't you go piss your pants again?
Greg the Soccer Player:
That was like eight years ago asshole.
Seth:
People don't forget. [turning back to Evan]
Seth:
You wanna hear the best part? Becka! You do the same thing with her. When you guys are shit faced at the party, you get with her. This is our last party as highschool people. I fully ignored my hatred for Becka in coming up with this plan.
Evan:
I should buy Becka alcohol?
Evan:
Yeah, man that will be pimp! That way you know she'll be drunk. You know when you hear girls saying like 'ahh I was so shit faced last night I shouldn't have fucked that guy,' we could be that mistake!
Evan:
Have you talked to Fogell?
Seth:
Alright, you talk to Becka. I'll talk to that retard Fogell. Don't worry.
Gym Teacher:
[Blows whistle] Seth, get off the field!
Seth:
[Kicks soccer ball into the stands] Goal!
Gym Teacher:
You're getting that!
Seth:
No I'm not.

Tags: People Quotes College Quotes Girls Quotes Hatred Quotes Man Quotes

[first lines]
Betty Warren:
[voiceover] All her life, she had wanted to teach at Wellesley College. So, when a position opened in the Art History department, she pursued it single-mindedly until she was hired. It was whispered that Katherine Watson, a first-year teacher from Oakland State, made up in brains what she lacked in pedigree. Which was why this bohemian from California was on her way to the most conservative college in the nation.

Tags: College Quotes History Quotes Land Quotes Art Quotes Conservative Quotes

Jake}:
Police Department! Let's see your hands!
Alonzo}:
Put your hands up! Put 'em up! Put 'em up! Driver, right side passenger, hands on the windshield!
Jake}:
[to female] Rear seat passenger, palms on the glass. Look that way!
Alonzo}:
Put it in park!
College Driver}:
Stick shift.
Alonzo}:
Take your keys out and throw 'em in the window. Take your keys out and throw 'em in the window.
Male College Passenger}:
I'm sorry.
Alonzo}:
[to front passenger] Shut up! Too late for that. [to driver]
Alonzo}:
Fork it over!
College Driver}:
What are you talking about?
Alonzo}:
You know what I'm talking about. The marijuana. Give it to me! Give it to me! [to front passenger]
Alonzo}:
Gimme that pipe underneath your seat.
Male College Passenger}:
My mom gave it to me.
Alonzo}:
I don't care who gave it to you. She can pick it up in jail. What else you got? C'mon, c'mon, gimme, gimme, gimme. [female removes hands from glass]
Alonzo}:
[to Jake] Hey, control your suspect!
Jake}:
Miss, palms on the glass!
Alonzo}:
[to female] You move those hands again, I'll slap the taste out of your mouth. Put your hands over there. Right there. [to driver]
Alonzo}:
Now what are you doing out here? You know this is a gang neighborhood?
College Driver}:
Yeah.
Alonzo}:
Then don't come down here again. I catch you down here again, I'ma take your vehicle. I'ma make you walk home. I'ma let the homeboys up the hill run a train on your girlfriend. You know what a train is, don't you?
College Driver}:
Yeah.
Alonzo}:
All right, thanks for your cooperation. [to Jake]
Alonzo}:
Let's go. Safe your iron, son.
Male College Passenger}:
Shit!

Tags: Ale Quotes College Quotes Police Quotes Talking Quotes Taste Quotes

Male Therapist:
So, Dale. I don't know how much you know about therapy, but it usually starts by you telling me a little something about yourself.
Dale Doback:
I work at a college as a janitor even though I feel like I'm smarter than most of the people who go there. Sometimes I see an equation written on a blackboard like half an equation and... I just figure it out.
Male Therapist:
Is this Good Will Hunting?
Dale Doback:
No.
Male Therapist:
It sounds alot like the plot of good will hunting.
Dale Doback:
Yeah. Anyway. My best friend is Ben Affleck...

Tags: People Quotes Best Friend Quotes Ale Quotes College Quotes People Quotes

Eric:
Mr. Reddy, so good to see you again!
Uncle Reddy:
Good to see you too. Best of luck in college too. [Takes out a $20 bill from his breast pocket and gives it to Eric; a cash register rings]
Eric:
All right.

Tags: College Quotes Luck Quotes

Johnny Rico:
Mr. Rasczak, I want to join the Federal Service and become a citizen. But my Dad thinks I should go to college and remain a civilian as he has. What should I do?
Jean Rasczak:
Figuring things out for yourself is practically the only freedom anyone really has nowadays. Use that freedom.

Tags: College Quotes Self Quotes Service Quotes Vice Quotes Freedom Quotes

Thorny:
Where you boys headed?
College Boy 1:
Canada.. we were goin' to Canada for some French fries and gravy, sir.
Thorny:
Canada, huh? Almost made it.

Tags: Canada Quotes College Quotes Boys Quotes

Kenny Red:
They think I could of did a whole bunch of intelligent things with my brain other than try to send these bitches but this is what I chose to do. This is what I'm doing. I had it hard and I hasn't able to go to college and things like that but I will be. It takes time, it takes motivation, it takes willpower, it takes brains, it takes knowhow. Ya, understand and my brain could be used for lots of things. Until I get the money to do these things I'm not gonna stand in your McDonalds. Ya know, I mean I'm not gonna sweep up your floors and wipe down you toilets. Ya know what I mean, for nothin'. Fuck you.

Tags: Money Quotes College Quotes Will Quotes Money Quotes

Pete Bell:
Dwayne, you can get through college half-assed. Richard, you can get through LIFE half-assed. But I'll guarantee you boys one thing: sure as hell, I'll guarantee you this: you cannot *win* half-assed!

Tags: College Quotes Boys Quotes Life Quotes

Richard M. Nixon:
She got it, Bob. 19-year-old college kid.
H. R. Haldeman:
What? Who?
Richard M. Nixon:
She understood something it's taken me 25 years in politics to understand. The CIA, the Mafia, those Wall Street bastards...
H. R. Haldeman:
Sir?
Richard M. Nixon:
The Beast. 19-year-old kid. She called it a wild animal.
H. R. Haldeman:
Yes, sir.

Tags: College Quotes Politics Quotes

Ari:
When I was in like, 5th grade, the miniseries "Roots" was this big thing. So, our teacher had us make family trees. I consulted my mom, and my grandmother, but we couldn't trace it back any further than New York, which was embarrassing. So, I lied and said that we were descended from Russian Tsars. Which is possible if any of them married poorly. Now Liam on the other hand, if there's a good Monty Python rerun on, or if he's had enough Guinness, will confess to a lineage of pirates. Dashing, hearty, seafaring men, known for their rich appetites and poor showings on college placement exams. Supposedly, he claims, they started out with the best of intentions. Rebellion against a tyrannical crown. But then conditions changed, and they lost track. They became desperados. Seduced, driven mad by a combination of lust and endless, chickless months at sea. They raped, they pillaged, they took things that were not theirs. See, that's the literal definition of piracy today. Record pirates, video pirates, love pirates. Maybe that's why Sam and I broke up. Maybe it was just sex. Maybe it was something we let our careers get away with. But no matter what, if we didn't have a hold on it, if it wasn't truly ours, then we had no right fucking with it. Yeah, we had a lot in common with Liam's pirates, Sam and I. The lust... the abandon... the tendency to just burn everything in sight. I don't think I'll ever fall in love again.

Tags: Love Quotes Careers Quotes Age Quotes College Quotes Family Quotes

Loony Bin Jim:
That was fun... Now, let's go kill Castle in his miserable hole.
Jigsaw:
No, not yet. We're gonna have ourselves a little bit of fun with this. Next time he has to face us and a fucking army.
Loony Bin Jim:
Where do we get the army from?
Jigsaw:
Just like Uncle Sam, bro. We recruit in troubled neighborhoods. Offer a hundred grand towards a college education they're never gonna see and promise nobody ever has to go to Iraq. [laughs]
Loony Bin Jim:
Just as long as I get to kill Castle.
Jigsaw:
Don't worry, brother, you will. Just making damn sure this time he don't come back breathin'.

Tags: Education Quotes College Quotes Education Quotes Army Quotes Body Quotes

[last lines]
Scott:
[on the phone with Cooper and Jenny] Hold on, this must be my new roommate. [Scotty opens the door and finds Mieke standing there]
Cooper:
[yelling over the phone] What's the freak look like? Is he a dork or is he cool? He better not be cooler than me. Is he bigger than me?
Scott:
I just got your last email. What are you doing here?
Mieke:
Going to college.
Scott:
You're going to college here? What dorm?
Mieke:
This one. Room 2-1-4.
Scott:
How is this possible?
Mieke:
I guess they thought I was a guy.
Scott:
Now who would be dumb enough to make a mistake like that? [Scotty and Mieke kiss]
Cooper:
[over the phone] Do I hear kissing? Are you making out with your new roommate, Scotty? [Scotty and Mieke fall on Scotty's bed laughing and continue to make out]
Cooper:
Scotty? Scotty? *Scotty*!
Green Fairy:
[Green Fairy appears] This happy ending is bullshit! When does the fairy get laid? I'm outta here! [makes the words The End appear with his wand, flies away]

Tags: Bed Quotes College Quotes Ending Quotes Lies Quotes Dumb Quotes

Barry Worth:
Listen, I made a mistake, all right? I could have played college ball, and I could have gone pro. Listen to me when I'm talkin' to you. But I messed up. I dropped out of school, and I didn't get an education and that was it.
Quincy Worth, Barry's Son:
So because you messed up, I can't get the shoes?
Barry Worth:
No. No. Because I messed up, you can't mess up. Thinkin' you need things you don't. You're listenin' to the wrong people, son. Well, when you're older, you'll understand.
Quincy Worth, Barry's Son:
When I'm older, I'll end up just like you.

Tags: Education Quotes College Quotes Education Quotes

Christian Finnegan:
If you went to the Democratic convention this summer, what your saying about yourself is, "Hey! Remember that guy that was doing charity work so that it would look good on his college application? That was me!"
Christian Finnegan:
If you went to the Republican convention this summer, what your saying about yourself is, "Hey! Remember that guy that was doing charity work so that it would look good on his college application? I was beating the crap outta that kid!"

Tags: Charity Quotes College Quotes Rap Quotes Republican Quotes Saying Quotes

Detective Nick Ruskin:
[while driving through college campus] We've liasoned with the campus police, posted fliers. Figure someone had to see somethin important.
Alex Cross:
An environment fit for blending. For you a security nightmare. For him, paradise.
Detective Nick Ruskin:
We're gonna get this animal.

Tags: College Quotes Environment Quotes Security Quotes Driving Quotes Us Quotes

Marshal Biggs:
This is hinky, this guy's a college graduate, he went to medical school, he's not gonna come through all the security, go to the county lockup, to find someone his one people say does not exist. Hinky.
Deputy Marshal Samuel Gerard:
Well, what does that mean Biggs, 'hinky'?
Marshal Biggs:
I don't know. Strange.
Marshal Henry:
Weird.
Deputy Marshal Samuel Gerard:
Well, why don't you say strange or weird? I mean hinky, that has no meaning.
Marshal Biggs:
Well, we say hinky.
Deputy Marshal Samuel Gerard:
I don't want you guys using words around me that have no meaning. I'm taking the stairs and walking.
Marshal Biggs:
[sotto voice] How about 'bullshit?' How about 'bullshit', Sam?

Tags: People Quotes College Quotes People Quotes Stairs Quotes Words Quotes

Clark Kellogg:
I'm illegally transporting endangered species! Please, sir, I'd like to be let out.
Carmine Sabatini:
Wait a minute. This is an impossibility.
Clark Kellogg:
What do you mean? Why can't...
Carmine Sabatini:
Look, uh, Clark. I have a certain standing in the business community. Now, how's it gonna look, some college kid gonna make me look like a fool? It's humiliation. It's infamia.

Tags: College Quotes Business Quotes

[Montage of teachers talking to David's classes]
College Counselor:
For those of you going on to college next year, the chance of finding a good job will actually decrease by the time you graduate. The available number of entry-level jobs will drop 31 percent over the next four years. Median income for those jobs will go down as well. Obviously, my friends, it's a competitive world, and good grades are your only ticket through. In fact, by the year 2000...
Health Teacher:
The chance of contracting HIV from a non-monogamous lifestyle will climb to 1 in 150. The odds of dying in an auto accident are only 1 in twenty-five hundred. Now, this marks a drastic increase...
Science Teacher:
...from fourteen years ago, when ozone depletion was just at 10 percent of its current level. By the time you are thirty years old, average global temperature will have risen two and a half degrees, causing such catastrophic consequences as typhoons, floods, widespread drought, and famine. [Cut to David absorbing all this grim information and looking really depressed]
Science Teacher:
[With a bright smile:] Okay! Who can tell me what "famine" is?

Tags: Health Quotes Age Quotes Acting Quotes Chance Quotes College Quotes

Sean:
I just have a little question here. You could be a janitor anywhere. Why did work at the most prestigious technical college in the whole fuckin' world? And why did you sneak around at night and finish other people's formulas that only one or two people in the world could do and then lie about it? 'Cause I don't see a lot of honor in that, Will.

Tags: People Quotes College Quotes People Quotes Honor Quotes Night Quotes

Dawn Weiner:
But I don't want to go to Disney World.
Mark Weiner:
Don't be stupid. At least it'll look good on your college resume.

Tags: College Quotes Dawn Quotes Disney Quotes

Snake:
It's a fact, College girls have three times more sexual partners than a regular girl.

Tags: College Quotes Girls Quotes

Woman:
Tell me, how old is umm... Sarah the Dancer.
Man:
Oh, she's a... she's a college graduate.
Woman:
Her age?
Man:
She's a recent college graduate.
Woman:
Yeah, like 21.
Man:
22. [Woman walks away. Man follows]
Man:
But she's 23 on August the 12th!
Woman:
23 on August the 12th... Well, that's a beautiful age.
Man:
Why would you wanna know?
Woman:
You know why I wanted to know.
Man:
Maybe I do. Say it anyway.
Woman:
I wanted to know because I wanted to know. I wanted know if you were flirting with me.
Man:
What does Sarah's age have to do with it?
Woman:
I am the same age as you, I think, and a man, my age, who prefers 23 on August the 12th might not flirt with someone who is... lets just say 15 years past 23 on August the 12th.

Tags: Age Quotes College Quotes Man Quotes Past Quotes Flirting Quotes

Nancy:
[on cell phone] What? You definitely know there's a God 'cause why?
Bess:
Because at this very moment I am a girl on a raft in a sea of male cuteness. Remember all those years in high school when I was like, "Where are all the cute boys?" They were here Nancy, at River Heights University, all along. Cute football boys, cute skater boys, even cute computer geek boys! I feel like that "Crocodile Hunter" guy. I have found the sacred watering hole of the gorgeous male. I swear, if I'd known, I would have gone to college years ago.

Tags: Ale Quotes College Quotes God Quotes School Quotes Cute Quotes

Max:
Mother fucker. Don't you test me mother fucker, I'll call the cops on your college quarterback ass.

Tags: College Quotes Mother Quotes

Brodie:
Hey, look at that ring. What is that?
Jared Svenning:
That is, um, my Junior College class ring. Cum Laude, '69.
Brodie:
I also hope to cum loud one day, preferably in a 69.

Tags: Class Quotes College Quotes Hope Quotes

[first title card]
Title Card:
pulp /'p&lp/ n. 1. A soft, moist, shapeless mass of matter.
Title Card:
2. A magazine or book containing lurid subject matter and being characteristically printed on rough, unfinished paper.
Title Card:
American Heritage Dictionary
Title Card:
New College Edition

Tags: Age Quotes College Quotes

Sam Witwicky:
Bee, I want to talk to you about the college thing, okay?
Bumblebee:
[does a dance] "I'm so excited, / And I just can't hide it..."
Sam Witwicky:
Hey! I'm not taking you with me! [Bumblebee is downcast]
Mikaela Banes:
I'm gonna wait outside... [goes outside and starts to strip]
Sam Witwicky:
Bumblebee, just hear me out okay? You know, freshmen aren't allowed to have cars, that's all it is. It is best for both of us. I know it doesn't sound like it but... you're an Autobot, you shouldn't be living in my dad's garage. I mean you're suffocating in here. Hey will you look at me please? Hey, come on big guy... [gives Bumblebee a hug]
Sam Witwicky:
Look, the guardian thing is done, okay? You did your job. It's over with. You've gotta be something else, you've got have a bigger purpose then just me, Bee! I can't be the end all deal in your life! I wanna be normal, I want to go to college. Everybody has this, and I should be able to experience this. And I can't do that with you. [Bumblebee bursts into tears; literally, with his windscreen cleaners malfunctioning]
Sam Witwicky:
Come on... it's not the last time I'm gonna see you, you know? Come on, don't do that... Bee, you're killing me... [Bee angrily gesticulates to Sam to go away]
Sam Witwicky:
You'll always be my first car man. I love you. [leaves the garage]

Tags: Love Quotes Men Quotes College Quotes Killing Quotes Men Quotes

Elwood Blues:
[while the Russian's are at the burial sight of a loved one, Elwood is trying to get Mr. Fabulous, who has now become a funeral director, to rejoin the band] [loudly]
Elwood Blues:
Hey, Mr. Fabulous, what time you want us to come back and grab the rings and watch off the corpse?
Mighty Mack:
[Russians at the funeral begin to talk amongst themselves in Russian] [more loudly]
Mighty Mack:
And what about the deal with the medical college for his dick!
Mr. Fabulous:
[the Russians begin to yell, get out their weapons, and shoot at them] ... We're dead now. [Elwood, Mack, Buster, and Mr. Fabulous run to the Bluesmobile and drive away]

Tags: College Quotes Heir Quotes Time Quotes Trying Quotes Us Quotes

Old Wen:
Old Chu, do'nt get upset. Girls eventually leave home. It was bound to happen.
Chu:
I'm not upset. I hope they all move out, so I can have a quiet life.
Old Wen:
Quiet life? I know you. What you want, you can't get. What you don't want, you can't get rid of. You're as repressed as a turtle. That old maid of yours, Jia-Jen, will stick to you for life unless you marry her off!
Chu:
Marry who? Since she lost her asshole college boyfriend she's never looked at another man. You know that.
Old Wen:
And now she has the perfect boyfriend: Jesus Christ.
Chu:
Don't make fun of her religion! How is it that for 30 years I have put up this kind of talk from you?
Old Wen:
The truth is, you should be thankful someone's around to tell the truth.

Tags: College Quotes Girls Quotes Will Quotes Boyfriend Quotes Fun Quotes

Mr. Pink:
I'm very sorry the government taxes their tips, that's fucked up. That ain't my fault. It would seem to me that waitresses are one of the many groups the government fucks in the ass on a regular basis. Look, if you ask me to sign something that says the government shouldn't do that, I'll sign it, put it to a vote, I'll vote for it, but what I won't do is play ball. And as for this non-college bullshit I got two words for that: learn to fuckin' type, 'cause if you're expecting me to help out with the rent you're in for a big fuckin' surprise.

Tags: College Quotes Heir Quotes Help Quotes Play Quotes Taxes Quotes

Pilachowski:
Hey Jimmy, my tight end is... deaf.
Jimmy McGinty:
Yeah, I know.
Pilachowski:
Well Jimmy, how am I gonna coach a deaf man?
Jimmy McGinty:
Oh, you don't need to. Brian Murphy would've gone in the first round 5 years ago if he hadn't been born deaf. Played his college ball right here in D.C., Galludet.
Pilachowski:
But Jimmy, I need to communicate with him and how...?
Jimmy McGinty:
Learn to sign, you know... [does some sign language]
Pilachowski:
Oh, horseshit!
Jimmy McGinty:
Look at it this way; he'll never be called offsides on an audible.

Tags: College Quotes Right Quotes

Buddy Love:
[touches her sexually] Is that a test tube in my pocket, or am I just happy to see you?
Wellman College Alumni:
[pushes away] Ugh! How dare you!
Buddy Love:
Oh, you know you love it. I felt your percolating.

Tags: Love Quotes College Quotes Man Quotes Love Quotes

Osmosis:
So, where you from, tough stuff?
Drix:
I was developed at the University of Chicago, where I graduated Phi Beta Capsule.
Osmosis:
Great, got me a college boy...

Tags: College Quotes University Quotes

Ripcord:
Hey, man, Breaker told me Scarlett graduated college at 12 years old. She's like some freaky little deadly genius.
Duke:
[Ripcord leans on Bars] Rip. I get it, Rip. You like her.
Ripcord:
Sorry, my bad. To hell with it.
Duke:
[Rip let's go] Rip. Rip.

Tags: College Quotes Hell Quotes

Carrie Mae:
The only magic I ever did was try to figure out how to stay in college for nine years and not go back to my trailer park in Idaho.

Tags: College Quotes Magic Quotes

[first lines]
Title Card:
"I don't think anybody could have predicted that these people would take an airplane and slam it into the WTC." - National Security Advisor Condoleezza Rice
Title Card:
"There were lots of warnings." - Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld
Title Card:
"No warnings." - Press Secretary Ari Fleischer
Title Card:
"Your government failed you, and I failed you." - White House Advisor Richard Clarke
Narrator:
March 13, 1962. Lionel Lemnitzer, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, presents a proposal to Secretary of Defense Robert McNamara named Operation Northwoods. The Document proposes staging terror attacks in and around Guantanamo Bay to provide a pretext for military intervention in Cuba. The plans included: starting rumors... staging a terror campaign in Miami, Florida and Washington, DC, and finally, destroying a drone aircraft over Cuban waters. The passengers, federal agents in reality, would allegedly be college students on vacation. A plane at Eglin AFB would be painted and numbered as an exact duplicate for a registered civil aircraft belonging to a CIA front in Miami. The duplicate would be substituted for the real plane and loaded with the passengers. The real plane would be converted into a drone. The two planes would rendezvous south of Florida. The passenger laden plane would land at Eglin Airforce Base to evacuate its passengers and return to its original status. The drone would pick up the scheduled flight plan and, over Cuban waters, transmit a mayday-signal before being blown up by remote control. - The plan is rejected by McNamara and President John F. Kennedy removes Lemnitzer as Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff month later.
Narrator:
December 1, 1984. A remote controlled Boeing 720 takes off in Edwards AFB and is crashlanded by NASA for reseach. Before its destruction the plane flew unmanned for a total of 16h 22 min including ten takeoffs, 69 approaches, and 13 landings.

Tags: People Quotes Act Quotes College Quotes Defense Quotes Destruction Quotes

Mike O'Donnell:
[finds out that Scarlett is re-doing their yard] The divorce isn't final for another two weeks, so you have no right.
Scarlett O'Donnell:
Really? I spent the last 18 years of my life listening to you whine about what you could have done without me and I have no right?
Mike O'Donnell:
It's just that I put a lot of work in this yard.
Scarlett O'Donnell:
Did you? Really? Like the barbecue pit? Yeah, the way I remember that is that you spent about an hour working on it and then you spent the next two days complaining about how " If you had gone to college then you could have had hired someone else to do it."
Mike O'Donnell:
I don't think it was a whole two days...
Scarlett O'Donnell:
What about the hammock over here?
Mike O'Donnell:
Yeah...
Scarlett O'Donnell:
Yeah, I think you quit that one because you just decided not try anymore.

Tags: College Quotes Heir Quotes Complaining Quotes Divorce Quotes Life Quotes

Long-haired Jock:
Aren't you that chick who's having sex with that college guy?
Eden:
[annoyed] NO.
Long-haired Jock:
Wanna be?
Jessica (Clive):
She's not interested, so why don't you just back off?
Long-haired Jock:
Oh, OK. GRANDPA. What are you, a pimp and these are your skank hoes! [Jessica slaps him hard]
Long-haired Jock:
You and me, right now, lets go.
Jessica (Clive):
Where are we going?

Tags: College Quotes Sex Quotes Right Quotes

Lavinia:
I said we went to college together.
Suzette:
I went to college? I'm a really bad liar Vinny!

Tags: College Quotes

Jack O'Callahan:
You know what Coxy let me ask you a question. Why'd you wanna play college hockey?
Cox:
Isn't it obvious? For the girls.

Tags: College Quotes Play Quotes

Anita Miller:
First it was butter then it was sugar and white flour, bacon, eggs, balogna, rock 'n roll, motorcycles. Then! It was celebrating Christmas on a day in September when you knew it wouldn't be commercialized! What else are you gonna ban?
Elaine Miller:
Honey, you want to rebel against knowledge, I'm trying to give you the cliffnotes on how to live life in this world.
Anita Miller:
We're like nobody else I know!
Elaine Miller:
I am a college professor. Why can't I teach my own kids? Use me!
Anita Miller:
Darryl says that you use knowledge to keep me down. He says that I'm a "Yes" person and you are trying to raise us in a "No" environment.
Elaine Miller:
Well, clearly "No" is a word Darryl doesn't hear much.
Anita Miller:
I can't live here! I hate you! Even William hates you!
Young William:
I don't hate her.
Anita Miller:
You do hate her! You don't even know the truth.
Elaine Miller:
Dramaqueen.
Anita Miller:
Feck you!
Elaine Miller:
Hey!
Anita Miller:
This is a house of lies!

Tags: Christmas Quotes College Quotes Day Quotes Hate Quotes Body Quotes

Fat Camp Counselor:
You've lost two pounds.
Jay Sherman:
Yes! Back to my college weight!

Tags: College Quotes

Pete Maravich:
[Giving his report on his dream to the class] My dream is to get a college scholarship to play basketball. [Class laughs]
Pete Maravich:
And I'm gonna be the man to make a million dollars playing pro basketball. [Class laughs agian]
Pete Maravich:
Also I wanna play on a championship team and get a big ring that says I was one of the greaatest basketball players of all time. [Class laughs agian and he hands it to the teacher]

Tags: Basketball Quotes Class Quotes College Quotes Giving Quotes Man Quotes

Cynthia McNarma:
They're announcing the winner after that big Shakespeare thing at Parent's Weekend, which reminds me. Did you want to go and get some tickets?
Steve McNarma:
No!
Kyle Morgan:
They always do a bad job at that anyway. Don't they?
Steve McNarma:
Yeah! I wouldn't even come to that whole event or whatever. It's really just a big recruitment thing for the college anyway
Cynthia McNarma:
But I just thought...
Steve McNarma:
I don't even think parents are invited.
Kyle Morgan:
Yea, no, me neither.
Cynthia McNarma:
I'm confused? At Parent's Weekend?

Tags: College Quotes Parents Quotes

College Boy 3:
[stoned] I'm freakin' out, man!
Rabbit:
Yes, you are freaking out... man.

Tags: College Quotes

Corny Collins:
[singing] Who cares about sleep when you can snooze in school? You'll never get to college but you'll sure look cool!

Tags: College Quotes Sleep Quotes

Avery Bishop:
If you ever want me to be with another woman for you, I'd do it. It's not something I'm interested in. Once, yeah, it seemed normal, but it was just a phase, a college thing, like torn Levi's or law school for you. Would you like something from the kitchen? I'm gonna get some fruit.

Tags: College Quotes Law Quotes Man Quotes School Quotes Woman Quotes

Uncle Ben:
You know a lot of people say that college is a time when young men and women expand the way that they look at their world when they open their mind to new ideas and experiences and when they begin that long journey form the innocence of Youth, to the responsibilities of Adulthood... now isn't that a load of horse shit! AHAHAHAHA!

Tags: Women Quotes People Quotes Men Quotes College Quotes Heir Quotes

Elizabeth Osbourne:
Look at your life. You've never been able to stick to a decision. I mean, 10 years of college and not a single degree. How do you know you won't change your mind about this, too? [brief pause]
Bree Osbourne:
Because I know.
Elizabeth Osbourne:
Don't do this awful thing to yourself, please. I miss my son.
Bree Osbourne:
Mom, you never had a son.
Elizabeth Osbourne:
[crying] How can you say such a thing?
Bree Osbourne:
Now you know how I felt when you hired those private detectives.
Elizabeth Osbourne:
[crying] We only tried to do the best for you.
Bree Osbourne:
Is that why you tried to have me committed?
Elizabeth Osbourne:
[shouting] You tried to kill yourself!
Bree Osbourne:
Because you tried to have me committed!
Elizabeth Osbourne:
I don't know why you have to be so emotional.
Bree Osbourne:
[shouting] I am not emotional! [normally]
Bree Osbourne:
God, my cycle's all out of whack.
Elizabeth Osbourne:
You don't have cycles!
Bree Osbourne:
Hormones are hormones. Yours and mine just happen to come in purple little pills.

Tags: Change Quotes College Quotes Mind Quotes

Rabbit:
See, a lot of drug dealers use stickers to mark their products. Like a brand name.
Farva:
See? Where'd you learn that, Cheech? Drug school?
Captain O'Hagan:
Shut up, Farva. [to Rabbit]
Captain O'Hagan:
Did that bag you pulled off these College kids have that sticker?
Rabbit:
Uummm... [secretly looks at a bag he hid in his pocket]
Rabbit:
I don't believe it did.

Tags: College Quotes Heir Quotes Kids Quotes

[Roy Knable arrives inside a castle]
Spike:
My, my. Now you'll never get back to Kansas. [Roy looks behind him and sees that his remote is shattered into pieces]
Spike:
[raising his sword] En garde. [Roy gets a wooden stick]
Spike:
Oh, no sword. Have to talk to that prop man. [breaks the stick]
Spike:
Right about now, your wife is probably catching that train... right between the eyes. And you let it happen.
Darryl Knable:
[hurling one of Roy's swords towards the HVTV dish] Here it comes, Dad! [the sword gets sucked in the dish]
Spike:
I've taken loads of souls... and none more pathetic than yours, Roy. Say good night, Gracie.
Roy Knable:
[catching his sword tossed by Darryl] Not yet. [he starts dueling with Spike]
Roy Knable:
You see, I was captain of my junior college fencing team. All right. Co-captain.

Tags: College Quotes Right Quotes Words Quotes

Jake:
She's right... maybe you should get on that plane to Paris. Cause if you stay, we really only have the summer, then I go to college and we'll talk on the phone and spend the occasional weekend together which is nice. But chances are one night I'm gonna get wrecked and have unprotected sex with some girl in my dorm. You'll find her thong and call me a slut... I'll call you a cock-tease and we'll break up. So when you really think about it, what's the point?

Tags: College Quotes Sex Quotes Weekend Quotes Night Quotes

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