Dave: You own a zebra, I own a goat, what the hell does that have to do with cheating on your wife?
Steve Urkel: Edo, cheating is like wearing your grandmother's underpants. Sure, it may cover your hiney, but if you make a habit of it, you've got a serious problem.
Kate: I don't get it. I mean, these girls all seem so confident and cool. How do they not know that John's cheating on all of them? Crying Waitress: He's a total operator. He goes out with girls from different cliques so that they never actually talk to each other. [chuckles] Crying Waitress: And then he tells them that his father won't let him date during basketball season so they'll have to keep it a secret. Kate: How'd you learn all this stuff? Crying Waitress: [sobbing] I don't know, just a guess. [runs away crying]
Marcia Prior Glass: I'm really just a good girl who's more comfortable fighting with her husband than cheating on him. I guess I'd rather be a bitch then a slut... Vincent Antonelli: Does caring for someone make you a slut? Marcia Prior Glass: No. Expressing it does.
One time, I had this boyfriend who cheated on me. I cheated back and then we broke up and then got back together.
Waldo: Cheating it wrong, Eddie, and you should know that. I may get F's, but, by God, I earn them!
Sarah Pierce: I think I understand your feelings about this book. I used to have some problems with it, myself. When I read it in grad school, Madam Bovary just seemed like a fool. She marries the wrong man; makes one foolish mistake after another; but when I read it this time, I just fell in love with her. She's trapped! She has a choice: she can either accept a life of misery or she can struggle against it. And she chooses to struggle. Mary Ann: Some struggle. Hop into bed with every guy who says hello. Sarah Pierce: She fails in the end, but there's something beautiful and even heroic in her rebellion. My professors would kill me for even thinking this, but in her own strange way, Emma Bovary is a feminist. Mary Ann: Oh, that's nice. So now cheating on your husband makes you a feminist? Sarah Pierce: No, no, it's not the cheating. It's the hunger. The hunger for an alternative, and the refusal to accept a life of unhappiness. Mary Ann: Maybe I didn't understand the book!
Doc Holliday: [taunting a card player who believes Holliday is cheating him] Why Ed does this mean we're not friends anymore? You know Ed, if I thought you weren't my friend... I just don't think I could bear it!
Jigsaw: [after Amanda gets shot] Amanda... It's OK. This was your test. Your game. I was testing you. I took you in. I selected you for the honor of carrying on my life's work. But you didn't. You didn't test anyone's will to live. Instead you took away their only chance. Your games were unwinnable, your subjects merely victims. In my desperation I decided to give you one last chance. So I put everything in place. You didn't know that Lynn and Jeff were husband and wife. I had to keep that from you for the purposes of my game. I had to leave out the ruined marriage, the cheating wife, the vengeful husband, the neglected daughter and I let you make your own choices. I wanted you to succeed... You couldn't. [Amanda begins to collapse and die] Jigsaw: God... [Amanda finally dies] Jigsaw: Game over.
Bludworth: [to Alex] You already did that by walking off the plane. Now you gotta out when and how it'll come back at you. Play your hunch, Alex. If you think you can get away from it. But beware the risk of cheating the plan, disrespecting the design... could initiate a horrifying fury that would terrorize even the Grim Reaper - and you don't even want to fuck with that MacDaddy.
Jimmy: I still don't see how renting is funny. Virus: Well it's not funny. It's cheating. Jimmy: But funny and cheating are synonyms Virus: Whatever. Jimmy: "Whatever." Good response; I guess you win.
The Caller: Stu, you didn't tell your wife the truth, you're cheating. Stu: I'm not cheating on Kelly I never have! The Caller: Oh then what do you call it? Stu: Look, you're a guy sometimes you wanna know it's a possiblity alright? You know it's like having a beautiful home, but you still dream of that quick vacation down there, you know some nice hotel a great view I don't know maybe a pool. But it's a just a fantasy because you'll never really leave home! Do you hear what I'm saying? The Caller: [laughs] Kelly is a home and Pam is a motel. I'm sure they'll both appreciate that. Stu: Oh fuck you! The Caller: Hey, that kind of language is uncalled for.
Brucie: [Brucie is about to kick off] Our Savior Jesus, help me do this right and I promise to stop cheating on my wife with black men.
Scott: What do you mean you're dumping me? Fiona: Scott, I just can't take all the lying and cheating on each other anymore. Scott: What are you talking about? Sweetie, I never cheated on you! Fiona: I know. That's what makes this so hard.
Heather: Are you cheating on me? Derek: Noooo Heather: So you're not cheating on me? Derek: You're starting to annoy me.
Richard McCallister: [Re scheduling] Why not "The Wexler Chronicles"? Lenny: Against "Infidelity 101"? We'll get killed. Richard McCallister: Well, we'll do better than we will with "Cheating Heart." You said so yourself, Lenny. "Sex will always beat disgusting foods. But in a fight between sex and sex, the sexier show will win," and they have the sexier show. Seems to me that the only way to counter them is to go with an actual scripted story with characters and... *stories* and things. If only for the 35-and-ups. At least we'll do some kind of number. Vernon Maxwell: It's an interesting thought, Lenny. FDrom an ad sales perspective, we'll take the high-end cars, the insurance companies. Exec. #3: Uh, maybe pharmaceuticals, even? Lenny: Yeah. It's just so fucking artsy and... [disgustedly] Lenny: smart. Vernon Maxwell: Well, I'm sure you'll rein it in.
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