The Riddler: Can Bruce Wayne and Batman ever truly coexist? We'll find out today! But first, let's meet our contestants! Behind curtain number one... [the Riddler reveals Chase Meridian tied up and hung in a container high up in the room] The Riddler: The absolute fabulous Dr. Chase Meridian. She enjoys hiking, getting her nails done, and foolisihly hopes to be the love of Bruce's life! And behind curtain number two... [the Riddler reveals an identical container nearby Chase's. This one has Robin tied up] The Riddler: Batman's one and only partner. This acrobat-turned orphan likes Saturday morning cartoons and one day dreams being... The Riddler: [whispers] ... bare naked with a girl! The Riddler: And below these contestants... my personal favorite. A watery grave! [the Riddler reveals two holes in the floor leading into a dark pit. Both are underneath the two containers] The Riddler: [points to his scepter] Just one little touch, and you're two friends are *gull feed* on the rocks below. Not enough time to save them both. Which will it be, Batman? Bruce's love or the Dark Knight's junior partner? [the Riddler imitates a game show timer while Batman ponders in thought] Batman: There is no way for me to save them or myself. This is all one giant death trap. The Riddler: Judges? The Riddler: [makes a buzzer noise] I'm sorry. Your answer must be in the form of a question. But thank you for playing. [the Riddler begins to push the button on his scepter] Batman: Wait! I have a riddle for you! The Riddler: For me? Really? Tell me. Batman: I see without seeing. To me, darkness is as clear as daylight. What am I? The Riddler: Please! You're as blind as a bat! Batman: Exactly. [throws a batarang at his throne]
[Jay and Silent Bob are hitchhiking on a road late at night] Jay: I can't belive this shit. Five hours and not a single ride. Every day people hitch to Hollywood to stop studios from making films about 'em, but when you and me try it, it's like we're trapped in a fuckin' cartoon. [the Mystery Machine van from the Scooby Doo cartoons pulls up alongside Jay and Silent Bob]
Steve: Yeah, I know, the women folk don't seem to truly appreciate the finer things in life like cartoons and the gratuitous violence of the Three Stooges...
Welcome to Hell. Here's your accordion.
People are no damn good
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I know what I look like. I'm not a babe who's automatically going to be the leading-lady type. I think ... - Ashley Jensen
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Wow, that's a lot. Basically I have been trying to build a career for myself. I learned early on what to... - Alana Evans
The only person who beat me was Jenna Jameson and that kicks ass.... - Alana Evans
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