The Santa Clause

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Date created: April 2010

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The Santa Clause Vital Stats

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Release date 1994

Duration 97 min

Producer(s) Richard Baker, Caroline Baron, Jennifer Graham Billings...more

Director(s) John Pasquin...more John Pasquin...less

Writer(s) Leo Benvenuti, Steve Rudnick...more Leo Benvenuti, Steve Rudnick...less

Cast Tim Allen, Wendy Crewson, Judge Reinhold...more

Genre Comedy, Family,

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The Santa Clause Quotes

Charlie:
It is Santa! You killed him!
Scott:
Did not! And that's not Santa
Charlie:
Well, he was...

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Scott Calvin:
Hey, Charlie, you know how to call 911?
Charlie:
Sure, 9-1-1.

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Charlie:
My dad is Santa Clause.

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Sarah the Little Girl:
You're fatter this year.
Santa:
Thank you. You've grown too. Now go back to sleep. [Drinks the milk and gags a little]
Sarah the Little Girl:
What's wrong?
Santa:
I think the milk's a little sour.
Sarah the Little Girl:
It's soy milk.
Santa:
Huh?
Sarah the Little Girl:
You said you were lactose intollerant.

Tags: Drinks Quotes

Scott Calvin:
[he bag lifts him up] Hey, hey, HEY, wait, there is no chimminy here okay, no chimminy.
Charlie:
Lookin good Dad.
Scott Calvin:
[hovers over a thin pipe] You have got to be kidding me.

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Bernard:
Haven't you people ever heard about basting?

Tags: People Quotes People Quotes

Scott Calvin:
Look, I am not Santa Claus! Ahhh!
Bernard:
Did you or did you not read the card?
Scott Calvin:
Yeah, I read the card.
Bernard:
Then you're the new Santa. And putting on their hat and jacket, you accepted the contract
Scott Calvin:
What contract?
Bernard:
The card in the Santa suit, you said you read it, right? So when you put on the suit, you fell subject for the Santa Clause.
Scott Calvin:
The Santa Claus? Oh, you mean the guys that fell off my roof?
Bernard:
No, no, not Santa Claus, the person. Santa Clause the clause.
Scott Calvin:
What?
Bernard:
You're a businessman right? Okay, a clause as in the last line of the contract.
Bernard:
[Scott looks confused] You got the card? Okay look. [Reads what the I.D. card says]
Scott Calvin:
What does that mean?
Bernard:
It means you put on the suit, you're the big guy.
Scott Calvin:
That ridiculous, I didn't put on a suit to...
Bernard:
[shouts] *Try to understand this!*

Tags: Act Quotes Heir Quotes Man Quotes

Scott Calvin:
[about what will happen for Christmas Eve dinner] Are you going to your mom's for dinner.
Laura:
Actually, we're going with Neil's family.
Scott Calvin:
Ah, Christmas at the pound! [mockingly imitates a howling wolf, a hissing cat, and a cat meowing]

Tags: Christmas Quotes Will Quotes

Bernard:
[looks at Neil's sweater] Nice sweater. Hey, did we make this? [starts checking the tag on the sweater]

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Charlie:
It's Santa! You killed him!
Scott:
Did not! And he's not Santa!
Charlie:
Well, he was...

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Charlie:
[as he tosses the snow globe to Scott] Remember!

Tags: Snow Quotes

Scott Calvin:
Why not? What if don't buy any of this Santa Clause thing? What if I choose not to believe it? [a dead silence falls upon the workshop]
Bernard:
Then there would be millions of disappointed children around the world. You see, children hold the spirit of Christmas within their hearts. You don't wanna be responsible for killing the spirit of Christmas, now would you... Santa?

Tags: Children Quotes Children Quotes Christmas Quotes Heir Quotes Killing Quotes

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