Views: 141
Date created: April 2010
Release date 2003
Duration 118 min
Producer(s) ...more ...less
Director(s) ...more ...less
Writer(s) ...more ...less
Cast ...more ...less
Genre Comedy,
Walt: She'll be back. Where else is she gonna find a guy like you? Bob: I don't know. Chernobyl?
Walt: Christ Bob, you haven't been laid in five years. Bob: Hey, how would you know? [Walt gives him a serious look] Bob: Damn.
Bob: Hey, I'm alone! Convenience Store Patron: Great buddy, you're gonna stay that way, too!
Mimmy: Bob, the people at Table 14 are really hungry, where's the food? Bob: How much time have I got left? Mimmy: You're already fourteen minutes over! Bob: Well then, what are they bitching about? They're gonna get a free meal.
Bob: [to Walt] Don't you walk away from me!
Walt: All right. Burgers on the house! [everyone shouts "Yeah!"] Bob: He's just kiddin', you cheap bastards.
Cher: I was a bitch with a capital C.
May: [to Bob and Walt] Look, I was hoping we could have a word in private, I mean just the three of us.
Man in burger bar: [to Rocket] Hey! I ordered diet coke! Rocket: Enjoy your meal Man in burger bar: [to Bob] Hey you shouldn't have freaks in here! Bob: You know, your absolutely right, we don't want freaks in here, so Rocket, would you kindly show this freak to the door?
[on her new TV show] Cher: This makes Touched by an Angel look like Trainspotting.
Walt: Are you kidding? You could win an humanitarian award for how nice you were to us. Cher: Aww... no. Well, really, is there talk of me getting one? Walt: No, no, it's just a figure of speech.
April: [after surgery to separate the twins] Bob, you look good. Walt: He looks good. What am I chopped liver? April: Actually, yeah.
[Walt and Bob are considering separation] Walt: Think about it. You'll be able to read a book alone, play golf by yourself, [whispering] Walt: masturbate in private like the good Lord intended. Bob: What are you talking about? Walt: Oh, please, last night it was like trying to sleep next to a paint-shaker.
Morty O'Reilly: I'm gonna have to level with you. Siamese twins ain't the easiest sell I've ever had. Bob: We're not Siamese. We're American.
Cher: [to extremely young lover, while in bed together] Go to bed. You have a geography test in the morning.
[from trailer] Bob: We share a liver. April: Are you sure you even need a liver?
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