Date created: April 2010
Release date 1997
Duration 98 min
Producer(s) Laurie MacDonald, Steven R. Molen, Walter F. Parkes...more
Director(s) Barry Sonnenfeld...more
Writer(s) Lowell Cunningham, Ed Solomon, Ed Solomon...more
Cast Tommy Lee Jones, Will Smith, Linda Fiorentino...more
[In a shooting range, confronted with numerous menacing-looking targets, Edwards shoots a cardboard little girl]
May I ask why you felt little Tiffany deserved to die?
Well, she was the only one that actually seemed dangerous at the time, sir.
How'd you come to that conclusion?
Well, first I was gonna pop this guy hanging from the street light, and I realized, y'know, he's just working out. I mean, how would I feel if somebody come runnin' in the gym and bust me in my ass while I'm on the treadmill? Then I saw this snarling beast guy, and I noticed he had a tissue in his hand, and I'm realizing, y'know, he's not snarling, he's sneezing. Y'know, ain't no real threat there. Then I saw little Tiffany. I'm thinking, y'know, eight-year-old white girl, middle of the ghetto, bunch of monsters, this time of night with quantum physics books? She about to start some shit, Zed. She's about eight years old, those books are WAY too advanced for her. If you ask me, I'd say she's up to something. And to be honest, I'd appreciate it if you eased up off my back about it. [pause]
Or do I owe her an apology? [pauses again]
That's a good shot though...
Maybe you already answered this, but, why exactly are we here?
[noticing a recruit raising his hand] Son?
Second Lieutenent Jake Jenson:
Second Lieutenant, Jake Jenson. West Point. Graduate with honors. We're here because you are looking for the best of the best of the best, sir! [throws Edwards a contemptible glance]
Second Lieutenent Jake Jenson:
What's so funny, Edwards?
Boy, Captain America over here! "Best of the best of the best, sir!" "With honors." Yeah, he's just really excited and he has no clue why we're here.
[the Edgar-Bug has just captured the deputy medical examiner Laurel Weaver and is holding her at ray-gunpoint]
Let her go, shit eater.
Oh, listen, monkey boy. Compared to you humans, I'm on the top of the evolutionary ladder, so can it, all right?
You're breaking my heart. Show me your face and I'll cure all your ills.
You ever pull the wings off a fly? You care to see the fly get even?
I want to talk to you.
NYPD Sergeant at Edwards ' Interrogation:
[shouting at Edwards] Ten minutes - you take your best shot, tough guy!
Take ten minutes on a Stairmaster, you pudgy bastard!
We are the best kept secret in the galaxy. We monitor, licence and police all alien activity on the Earth. We're your first, last, and only line of defense. We live in secret, we exist in shadow.
And we dress in black.
[the alien perp is on top of a building running away from Jay. He opens up a door and sees Jay pointing his gun at him]
He's coming because I failed and now he'll kill me, too.
Yeah, well you just pissing everybody off today, huh?
You don't understand. Your world's gonna end. [He blinks with his eyeballs]
What the hell are you? [the perp is on the edge of the building]
Hey, watch that ledge. Watch the ledge. Look, come on down and we'll get those eyes fixed. Don't even worry about it. Let me talk to you. Hey, hey! [the perp raises his arms, falls off the building and lands on the sidewalk]
[after Kay informs Zed that they have a bug]
And what, we don't like bugs?
Bugs thrive on carnage, Tiger. They consume, infest, destroy, live off the death and destruction of other species.
You were stung as a child, weren't you?