Hollywood Homicide

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Date created: April 2010

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Hollywood Homicide Vital Stats

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Release date 2003

Duration 116 min

Producer(s) Scott Bernstein, Allegra Clegg, David V. Lester...more

Director(s) Ron Shelton...more Ron Shelton...less

Writer(s) Robert Souza, Ron Shelton...more Robert Souza, Ron Shelton...less

Cast Harrison Ford, Josh Hartnett, Lena Olin...more

Genre Action, Comedy, Crime,

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Hollywood Homicide Quotes

[Joe crashes K.C.'s Ford Mustang into Sartian's Cadillac Escalade, causing a huge collision at the corner of Hollywood Blvd. and Orange Drive]
K.C.:
[breahless] Nice driving.
Joe Gavilan:
Sorry.

Lt. Bennie Macko:
Here we go... Joe.

Tags:

K.C.:
I don't think I want to be a cop anymore.
Joe Gavilan:
Then what do you want to be?
K.C.:
I want to be an actor.
Joe Gavilan:
[shrugs] You're gay. I can deal with that.

Tags:

[inside Lt. Macko's office]
Joe Gavilan:
Commingling funds, huh? That's my crime? Commingling? Guilty. My alimony number one comes from money commingled with my beer money. My refinanced car commingled with the short-term loan to keep the second mortgage paid off, commingled with my alimony number three, commingled with every goddamn dime I've got tied up in my Mt. Olympus property. My whole life's commingled.
Lt. Bennie Macko:
We'll, I glad you brought up the property on Mt. Olympus. You're attemping to sell it without disclosing you also own it.
Joe Gavilan:
This isn't about real estate, is it, Bennie?

Tags: Money Quotes Beer Quotes Age Quotes Losing Quotes Money Quotes

Antoine Sartain:
It's just a game, nothing but a game.
Joe Gavilan:
Well we've got four mama's boys down at the morgue. It wasn't a game last night.

Tags: Boys Quotes

Lt. Bennie Macko:
I've got arrest warrants for Gavlian and Calden right here. Hey, separate them! I don't want them talking to anybody! Nobody talks to them until they get downtown. Christ! Shit!
Leon:
Shut up and turn around, Bennie!
Lt. Bennie Macko:
What?
Leon:
Cuff his ass and take him downtown.
Lt. Bennie Macko:
What are you talking about? [a couple of LAPD cops grab Bennie and arrest him]
Lt. Bennie Macko:
[argrly] Get your hands off me, you son-of-a-bitch. You're making a big mistake, pal. You can kiss your career goodbye!
Leon:
Good.
Lt. Bennie Macko:
[to Detective Zino] Call my lawyer!

Tags: Career Quotes Talking Quotes Body Quotes Rest Quotes Right Quotes

Hank the Bartender:
[Hands them their drinks] The doctor's in. Help is on its way.
K.C.:
Thanks, Hank. Something wrong, Joe?
Joe Gavilan:
What do ya mean, "Something Wrong?"
K.C.:
You seem down.
Joe Gavilan:
Down? Me?
K.C.:
Lately.
Joe Gavilan:
We've been partners for what, four months, and now you wanna be my shrink?
K.C.:
Sometimes it helps to talk. That's all I'm saying.
Joe Gavilan:
All right. Let me paint you a picture. Portrait of Joe Gavilan. Seven, eight years ago, I sold off the results of my entrepreneurial efforts up to that point: Three tanning salons and two original silk-tip nail parlors in the Antelope Valley, and I started attending weekend Real Estate seminars at the Airport Hyatt. You know, "How to Make $1 Million in Real Estate with Very Little Money Down."
K.C.:
Sounds good.
Joe Gavilan:
Started out with a condo in Sherman Oaks. Slapped some paint on the walls. Refaced the kitchen cabinets. Traded up to a smoke-damaged ranch in Tarzana, then a Spanish on Outpost, and a fake Mediterranean in Los Feliz. Pretty soon, I had everything I've got tied up in this... this monstrosity... on Mt. Olympus, at the corner of Hercules and, I shit you not, Achilles.
K.C.:
So what's the problem?
Joe Gavilan:
The problem is if I don't score a big commission or get rid of this... piece of shit on Mt. Olympus... well, the word *Titanic* comes to mind.

Tags: Money Quotes Ending Quotes Heir Quotes Help Quotes Man Quotes

Joe Gavilan:
Goddammit! Idiot! That's it! That's it! I'm driving! That's it!
K.C.:
All right, all right fine! You think you can do better? Go ahead, be my guest!
Joe Gavilan:
Dammnit! Trying to kill us!
K.C.:
All right, go!
Joe Gavilan:
Idiot!
K.C.:
Go ahead!

Tags: Right Quotes Trying Quotes

Joe Gavilan:
Yes, Yes, I do understand the rights you just explained to me. But you know what? I don't like to remain silent, and I do not need an attorney because this is all BULLSHIT! [looks out two-way mirror]
Joe Gavilan:
AND YOU CAN PUT THAT ON THE RECORD!

Tags: Rights Quotes

Joe Gavilan:
Fuck you very much!

Tags:

[Opens up Gavilan's burger bag only to find that his cheeseburger has lettuce and mayonnaise, and the meat wasn't done enough]
Joe Gavilan:
Hey, you. Come here. I see mayonnaise. Did anybody in this hear me say the word "Mayonnaise"? Read your notes. What does it say? "Cheeseburger, well done. Raw onion, ketchup, pickle". You call that well done? In addition to the mayonnaise, I see lettuce... Lettuce that somebody tried to scrape off here. This is a disaster. What the hell do they teach you at the Academy anyway? You wanna be a detective when you grow up?
Cheeseburger Cop:
Yes, sir.
Joe Gavilan:
Don't call me "sir!" I work for a living. Dump this for me please. I expect better.

Tags: Hell Quotes Body Quotes Work Quotes

Leon:
They called themselves H2OKlik,don't ask me why.

Tags:

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