Everything Is Illuminated

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Date created: April 2010

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Everything Is Illuminated Vital Stats

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Release date 2005

Duration 106 min

Producer(s) Kelley Cribben, Tom Karnowski, David Minkowski...more

Director(s) Liev Schreiber...more Liev Schreiber...less

Writer(s) Jonathan Safran Foer, Liev Schreiber...more

Cast Eugene Hutz, Elijah Wood, Jonathan Safran Foer...more

Genre Comedy,

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Everything Is Illuminated Quotes

Jonathan:
I'm a vegetarian.
Alex:
You're a what?
Jonathan:
I don't eat meat.
Alex:
How can you not eat meat?
Jonathan:
I just don't.
Alex:
[to Grandfather, in Russian] He says he does not eat meat.
Grandfather:
[to Alex, in Russian] What?
Alex:
No meat?
Jonathan:
No meat.
Alex:
Steak?
Jonathan:
No...
Alex:
Chickens!
Jonathan:
No...
Alex:
And what about the sausage?
Jonathan:
No, no sausage, no meat!
Alex:
[to Grandfather, in Russian] He says he does not eat any meat.
Grandfather:
[to Alex, in Russian] Not even sausage?
Alex:
[to Grandfather, in Russian] I know!
Grandfather:
[to Alex, in Russian] What is wrong with him?
Alex:
What is wrong with you?
Jonathan:
Nothing, I just don't eat meat!

Tags:

Alex:
Many girls want to be carnal with me... because I'm such a premium dancer!

Tags: Girls Quotes

Alex:
My grandfather informs me that is not possible.

Tags:

Alex:
I was of the opinion that the past is past, and like all that is not now it should remain burried along the side of our memories.

Tags: Past Quotes

Alex:
You make sex often with American girl?
Jonathan:
Not really.
Alex:
What is mean by "not really?"
Jonathan:
I'm not a priest, but I'm not John Holmes either.
Alex:
I have heard of this John Holmes. He has premium penis.
Jonathan:
Yes, he did.
Alex:
Everyne in Ukraine has penis like that.
Jonathan:
Even the women?
Alex:
You make joke, yes?
Jonathan:
Yes.

Tags: Sex Quotes

Alexander Perchov, Father:
[in Russian] Papa, I already have one son walking around Odessa looking like a lunatic. I don't need another.

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[in Russian, referring to Jonathan's trip to Lutsk]
Alexander Perchov, Father:
Papa, I need you to drive them.
Grandfather:
Go to hell! I'm not driving anyone.
Alexander Perchov, Father:
Papa, they are paying $1,200 American.
Grandfather:
I don't care. I'm retired. No more dead Jews.

Tags: Driving Quotes

Alex:
Please tell me, is the Shaq also the Jew?
Jonathan:
Who?
Alex:
The Shaqweel O'Neal, the Los Angeles Laker.
Jonathan:
Uh, no.
Alex:
And Michael Jackson?
Jonathan:
[Scoffs] *No*, definitely not a Jew.

Tags: Los Angeles Quotes

Grandfather:
[in Ukrainian] [to Alex and Jonathan]
Grandfather:
Perhaps you would like me to stop the car and you two can fuck yourselves to Lutsk!

Tags:

[as they drive by an abandoned, half-destroyed apartment building]
Jonathan:
What is it?
Alex:
Soviets.
Jonathan:
What happened?
Alex:
[pause] Independence.

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Alex:
[In Ukrainian] [to Lista]
Alex:
Please, don't be scared. Cars are totally safe now. They even have airbags, crumple zones... Maybe not this one... but most!

Tags:

[in Russian, referring to why Augustine never buried her ring]
Lista:
In case someone should come searching one day.
Alex:
So they would have something to find.
Lista:
No, it does not exist for you. You exist for it. You have come because it exists.

Tags:

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