Views: 121
Date created: April 2010
Release date 2002
Duration 50 min
Producer(s) Jonathan Berman...more Jonathan Berman...less
Director(s) Shoshana Perry...more Shoshana Perry...less
Writer(s) ...more ...less
Cast ...more ...less
Genre Movies,
Lance Barton: You see this foot? It's from a little town called "Rich Man's Ass" and it's getting' homesick!
Sontee Jenkins: What kind of man are you? Lance Barton: Sounds like I'm an asshole!
Lance Barton: Hey I still look like me. King: You are you. Lance Barton: I thought I was Wellington. King: You are Wellington. Lance Barton: Well thanks for clearing that up.
Lance Barton: I got hit by a truck, I got smashed by a car, I got shot. And now you want to take my soul? What are you, the Blair Witch?
Lance Barton: [As Charles Wellington, after offering Wanda a raise] Lance Barton: Are you happy? Wanda: I'm estatic.
[reincarnated for the second time as 'Joe Guy', Lance tries to hail a taxi, but they keep driving past him] Lance Barton: I'm a black again! I'm a black man!
Lance Barton: When I was a kid, we were so poor... that the roaches was on welfare.
Lance Barton: If you're good looking, you're gonna succeed through life. If you're ugly, you better pick up a book. Boy, you better pick up two books, and a computer while you're at it!
Lance Barton: Look, I don't have a problem with Sontee. I wanna ask her on a date. Mrs. Wellington: Oh, Charles! Lance Barton: Don't "Oh, Charles" me! You were gonna have sex on the pool table! You got an 8 ball in your ass!
Lance Barton: Shut up before I crush you with my wallet!
Lance Barton: From now on, we need to make a new slogan. If you get shot in the head, you get a bed. If your head is bloody, we're your buddy.
Lance Barton: I had a hard enough time trying to get this girl as a rich white man. Do you know how hard it's gonna be to try to get her as a broke black man?
[after learning that he wasn't supposed to die] Lance Barton: You killed me! You killed me! You killed me!
I never ever thought that I was a giggler. I was the one who could hold it together but I didn't on this... - Ashley Jensen
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They're not clothes that Ashley would wear. But the thing is, you can't stand out. At first I thought, ... - Ashley Jensen
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I know what I look like. I'm not a babe who's automatically going to be the leading-lady type. I think ... - Ashley Jensen
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Wow, that's a lot. Basically I have been trying to build a career for myself. I learned early on what to... - Alana Evans
The only person who beat me was Jenna Jameson and that kicks ass.... - Alana Evans
I've learned to think in terms of having a long career. Actors can have very long careers that last unti... - Bryce Dallas Howard
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