Carpool

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Date created: April 2010

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Carpool Vital Stats

[edit]

Release date 1996

Duration 89 min

Producer(s) Fitch Cady, Casey Grant, Arnon Milchan...more

Director(s) Arthur Hiller...more Arthur Hiller...less

Writer(s) Don Rhymer...more Don Rhymer...less

Cast Tom Arnold, David Paymer, Rhea Perlman...more

Genre Movies,

[add a quote]

Carpool Quotes

Todd:
I refuse to die in a polyester smock.

Tags:

[Daniel races for the phone. Franklin stops him]
Franklin:
No calls! That is, no obscene calls. He's trying to quit.
Daniel:
I am not.
Franklin:
Well you should! What's your phone number?
Daniel:
9-1-1.
Franklin:
Very funny. Do realize if I get arrested you won't make your meeting because you'll be filling out police reports until next October.

[Kayla slaps Bucky]
Kayla:
BUCKY!
Bucky:
What? I thought you were scared, so I grabbed you shoulder.
Kayla:
That *wasn't* my *shoulder*.

Tags: Bed Quotes Thought Quotes

Franklin:
[on his way to the bank, contemplating his robbery plan] This will go smooth. Unless they shoot me, which they won't because I'm gonna draw first. Of course they could push that button under the counter, but I know it's gonna be fine. [Parks and approaches bank. The doors are locked and standing inside is a guard]
Franklin:
Oh hey, buddy, I need you to open a safe for me. I mean an account, a safe account. But I see you're not open right now so I'll go grab a cup of coffee and come back later.

Tags: Coffee Quotes Will Quotes Right Quotes

Circus Performer:
We've come to give you back our pay checks.
Franklin:
Aw you didn't have to do that.
Circus Performer:
Sure we did. They bounced. Listen, Franklin, you've been very good to us, but we've gotten an offer from Wingling Brothers.
Franklin:
*THE* Ringling Brothers?
Circus Performer:
No, *WINGLING* Brothers!

Tags: Us Quotes

[location: in their van which is inside a refrigeration truck]
Andrew:
It's freezing.
Franklin:
Huddle together if you're cold, I'll turn on the heat.
Daniel:
That's brilliant. See in order to get heat you have to turn on the engine, thereby trapping the fumes and rendering us all dead by asphixiation.
Franklin:
In that case forget the heat. Hey who farted? Did you cut the cheese, Dan?
Daniel:
For God's sake, no I did not.
Franklin:
How about you, Kayla?
Kayla:
Girls don't fart.
Franklin:
Really? Come over to my house sometime and ask my mom why all our cats committed suicide.

Tags: Cats Quotes Girls Quotes Heir Quotes Forget Quotes Order Quotes

Franklin:
Uh oh. I dropped my wallet. I can't drive without a driver's license, you'll have to switch with me.
Daniel:
I don't think that rule applies when committing a felony.
Franklin:
Oh, right.

Tags: Lies Quotes

Lt. Serdman:
I'd say you picked the wrong store to rob this time, pal.
Franklin:
Excuse me, Lieutenant but I am not robbing this store.
Lt. Serdman:
Yeah right, I suppose that's a bag of donuts you got there right?
Franklin:
They don't even serve donuts here, you should know that, you're a cop.

Tags:

Franklin:
Boy you're touchy.
Travis:
He's got hemorrhoids, Franklin.
Franklin:
You got 'roids?

Tags:

Franklin:
[a jelly filled danish got rubbed on his shirt] Great! Raspberry glaze!
Old Lady:
Soak it in cold water.
Franklin:
Thank you very much, ma'am, and by the way, someone your age should be a little more careful with a hand gun.
Old Lady:
Bite me.

Tags: Bed Quotes Age Quotes

Daniel:
[about the ferris wheel] I'm not getting on that death trap.
Franklin:
Oh we won that law suit.
Daniel:
Huh?
Franklin:
Okay we tied, but it's still safe. Come on, I'll show you how to operate it. It's so easy a trained monkey could do it and it did until that uproar with the Humane Society.

Tags: Death Quotes Law Quotes

Old Lady:
He was a very annoying man.
Reporter:
The gun man?
Old Lady:
No, the gun man was very polite.

Tags: Man Quotes

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