Billy Madison

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Date created: April 2010

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Billy Madison Vital Stats

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Release date 1995

Duration 89 min

Producer(s) Fitch Cady, Jack Giarraputo, Robert Simonds...more

Director(s) Tamra Davis...more Tamra Davis...less

Writer(s) Tim Herlihy, Adam Sandler...more Tim Herlihy, Adam Sandler...less

Cast Adam Sandler, Darren McGavin, Bridgette Wilson...more

Genre Comedy,

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Billy Madison Quotes

[from a deleted scene]
Eric:
[referring to Max] That's right, I blackmailed you.

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Danny McGrath:
[On the phone] Hello?
Billy Madison:
Hello? Is this Danny? Danny McGrath?
Danny McGrath:
Yeah.
Billy Madison:
The Danny McGrath who graduated from Knibb Highschool in 1984?
Danny McGrath:
Yeah, who's this?
Billy Madison:
Umm... this is Billy Madison. You probably don't remember me but I went to high school with you. And I, um, kinda gave you a hard time back then, and, uh, I did some things I thought were funny at the time, and realized they were just mean and stupid. And I just called to apologize and hope you forgive me.
Danny McGrath:
[Nonchalant] Yeah, sure. Don't worry about it, it's no problem.
Billy Madison:
Wow, that's great! Well, I am sorry, and maybe we can get together sometime and have some coffee.
Danny McGrath:
Yeah, sure. I'd like that.
Billy Madison:
[Relieved] Okay, great! I'll see you around.
Danny McGrath:
Okay. Bye. [Danny reaches down, grabs a marker and uses it to cross Billy's name off of a list on his wall titled, "PEOPLE TO KILL". Once done, he puts on a large amount of bright red lipstick, sighs in relief and sits back to listen to his music]

Brian Madison:
Oh Billy, Billy boy, when are you going to find whatever it is you are looking for?
Billy Madison:
[the camera cuts to the street, where Billy and his friends find a piece of shit] Here's a nice piece of shit!

Tags: Friends Quotes Friends Quotes

Principal:
Mr. Madison, the Industrial Revolution changed the face of the modern novel forever. Discuss, citing specific examples. [Billy clears his throat several times]
Billy Madison:
Uh... Okay. The Industrial Revolution to me is just like a story I know called "The Puppy Who Lost His Way." The world was changing, and the puppy was getting... bigger. [Later]
Billy Madison:
So, you see, the puppy was like industry. In that, they were both lost in the woods. And nobody, especially the little boy - "society" - knew where to find 'em. Except that the puppy was a dog. But the industry, my friends, that was a revolution. [Long pause]
Billy Madison:
Knibb High football rules! [the crowd erupts into cheers]
Principal:
Mr. Madison, what you have just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.
Billy Madison:
Okay, a simple "wrong" would've done just fine.

Tags: God Quotes Mercy Quotes Evolution Quotes Football Quotes Revolution Quotes

Veronica Vaughn:
Norman invasion of England.
Billy Madison:
1036.
Veronica Vaughn:
That is correct. The Magna Carta.
Billy Madison:
1215.
Veronica Vaughn:
Yes. Spanish Armada.
Billy Madison:
1466. '67. 1469. 1514. 1981? 1986? Please do not do that. Come on, I swear... Just hang in there one second. Please, God, give me the answer!

Tags: Man Quotes

Billy Madison:
You want some more of that? I didn't think so!

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Veronica Vaughn:
Don't you think it's a little pathetic that just because of who your is Father, you get to do school all over again?
Brian Madison:
Yes, I do.

Tags: School Quotes

Scotty Logan:
Mom, that's Billy. He's in my class. I heard he's retarded or something. [Billy laughs]

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Billy Madison:
Give me one more chance, I'll prove I can take over. I'll do anything it takes. I'll go back to high school and take the exams again, and I'll get the diploma all by myself.
Brian Madison:
Billy, Billy, it wasn't just high school.

Tags: School Quotes

[first lines]
Billy Madison:
[sings] # Suntan lotion is good for me. / You protect me, hee-hee-hee. #

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Billy Madison:
Chlorophyll? More like BOREophyll.

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Frank:
Hey, you wanna go feed that donkey some beer? Get it all messed up?
Billy Madison:
Maybe later.

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