Ellen DeGeneres

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Date created: April 2010

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Ellen DeGeneres Vital Stats

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Birthdate January 26, 1958

Zodiac Aquarius

Location Jefferson Parish, Louisiana

Country United States of America

Etnhnicity

Job others,

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Ellen DeGeneres Quotes

My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She`s ninety-seven now, and we don`t know where the hell she is.

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I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beautiful animal. There you go. I think my mother is attractive, but I have photographs of her.

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My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the heck she is.

Tags: exercise family grandmothers grandparents humor walking

Why wait, procrastinate now....

Tags: procrastination

Procrastinate now. Don't put it off.

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You should never assume. You know what happens when you assume. You make an ass out of you and me because that's how it's spelled.

Tags: humor inspirational

One time I actually cleaned out my closet so good I ended up on the cover of Time magazine.

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Life is short. If you doubt me, ask a butterfly. Their average life span is a mere five to fourteen days.

Tags: butterflies humor inspirational

Procrastination is not the problem. It is the solution. It is the universe's way of saying stop, slow down, you move too fast. Listen to the music. Whoa whoa, listen to the music. Because music makes the people come together, it makes the bourgeois and the rebel. So come on people now, smile on your brother, everybody try to love one another. Because what the world needs now is love, sweet love. And I know that love is a battlefield, but boogie on reggae woman because you're gonna make it after all. So celebrate good times, come on. I've gotta stop I've gotta come to my senses, I've been out riding fences for so long... oops I did it again... um... What I'm trying to say is, if you leave tonight and you don't remember anything else that I've said, leave here and remember this: Procrastinate now, don't put it off.

Tags: humor truth

Dan: 'Ah, well, I hope this didn't have anything to do with me.'

Ellen: 'No, not unless you played Cat Woman in Batman.

Tags: batman lesbian

The only thing that scares me more than space aliens is the idea that there aren't any space aliens. We can't be the best that creation has to offer. I pray we're not all there is. If so, we're in big trouble.

Tags: aliens earth humanity universe

Have you ever heard somebody sing some lyrics that you've never sung before, and you realize you've never sung the right words in that song? You hear them and all of a sudden you say to yourself, 'Life in the Fast Lane?' That's what they're saying right there? You think, 'why have I been singing 'wipe in the vaseline?' how many people have heard me sing 'wipe in the vaseline?' I am an idiot.

Tags: lyrics music singing

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