Rodney Dangerfield

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Rodney Dangerfield

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Date created: April 2010

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Rodney Dangerfield Vital Stats

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Birthdate November 22, 1921

Zodiac Scorpio

Location Babylon, New York

Country United States of America

Etnhnicity

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Rodney Dangerfield Quotes

I went to a fight the other night, and a hockey game broke out.

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I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender.

Tags: affair humor psychiatrist wife

I could tell that my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio.

Tags: humor

When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.

Tags: found humor kids moving parents

I remmember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof.

Tags: humor

I came from a real tough neighborhood. Once a guy pulled a knife on me. I knew he wasn't a professional, the knife had butter on it.

Tags: crime funny humour neighborhoods

I came from a real tough neighborhood. In the library the sign says 'shut the fuck up!

Tags: fuck funny humour libraries neighborhoods profanity

Once I pulled a job, I was so stupid. I picked a guy's pocket on an airplane and made a run for it.

Tags: crime funny humour

What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bees and he told me about the butcher and my wife.

Tags: funny humour infidelity parenthood parenting sexuality

I came from a real tough neighborhood. Why, every time I shut the window I hurt somebody's fingers.

Tags: funny humour neighborhoods

I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet.

Tags: psychiatry

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I never ever thought that I was a giggler. I was the one who could hold it together but I didn't on this... - Ashley Jensen

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