George Burns

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George Burns

George Burns

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Date created: April 2010

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George Burns Vital Stats

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Birthdate January 20, 1896

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Location New York City, New York

Country United States of America

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George Burns Quotes

When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.

Tags: humor

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.

Tags: family happiness humor

Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair.

Tags: humor politics

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending; and to have the two as close together as possible.

Tags: humor religion

Money is the root of all evil.' Then we hear, 'A fool and his money are soon parted.' What are they talking about? If money is so evil, shouldn't it be, 'A wise man and his money are soon parted'? And another thing, how does a fool get money in the first place? I know some fools who have a lot of money, but they won't tell me how they got it, and I won't tell them.

Tags: evil fool humor money sayings wisdom

Acting is all about honesty. If you can fake that, you've got it made.

Tags: acting

I can't understand why I flunked American history. When I was a kid there was so little of it.

Tags: humor

I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.

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Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.

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Sincerity - if you can fake that, you've got it made.

Tags: fake sincerity

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I never ever thought that I was a giggler. I was the one who could hold it together but I didn't on this... - Ashley Jensen

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